Design Your Language with Kip & Lora Brown
I had a student once who fell asleep in my class every single day.
Not just head-on-desk asleep—full-on Goodnight Moon mode.
At first, I thought it was all his fault. I blamed, berated and bickered as he kept sawing logs.
Until, I realized… His language development depended on me.
He came up with the strange idea to literally kneel down when he got tired. Some could say he worshiped me.
over the next few classes,It became a reminder that I was putting him to sleep.
Which made me aware of when I was being boring!
The language I was using with him and the class wasn’t engaging enough. Language is much more than just the words we use. “It involves every layer of communication—physical, verbal, and nonverbal.”
When I started creating meaningful experiences that were based on storytelling, activities, and physical engagement strategies he stopped dozing off.
That’s the power of language being approached by more than just words.
Language is not just communicating with others, but it's communicate with yourself.
Design Duo for Life
Kip helped launch the iPhone which has impacted millions of lives,but used to spend over 200 nights a year away from home on average. He was leaving Lora to describe herself as a “married single mother.” He shares how “Life hides the game clock”, and when Lora was diagnosed with brain cancer, the glitz of corporate life lost its sparkle. His priorities radically shifted and their business became first to survive then thrive by designing their life together. They now mentor leaders to design their life, development & language.
"When you design your language with intention, you don't just describe your life--you design it"-Kip & Lora Brown
There are 3 key guideposts to design your language.
Guidepost #1 What you say to yourself is infinitely more important than what anyone else can say to you.
The way we craft our language matters.
Especially what is communicated out of our mouths to others and what is kept inside our head.
For Kip, “Worry is the highest form of consciousness”—it’s like pleading for problems to persist or praying for them to come true. Your brain doesn’t want to make you a liar. Every word you speak—positive or negative—is like sending it to the filing cabinet in your mind to pull out evidence that proves you right. So when you worry, your brain faithfully gathers proof and arranges the pieces of your life to make that worry a reality.
Quick tip: Instead of focusing on what you don’t want, just focus on what you do. Kip said, try NOT to think of the color blue. Guess what it isn’t possible for us to NOT think of blue because of needing to process that association. But if you rephrase it and have people think about Red Only, can you see how that will get the result you want, while moving forward?
Worry keeps your mind hyper-focused on worst-case scenarios, rehearsing failure instead of creating solutions, is actively creating chaos in the mind instead of calm.
Creative leadership language flips that script.
It’s about crafting possibilities with your words, replacing
[I can’t] with [How could I]
[The deadline can’t be met]… with [This is what we CAN do.]
This isn’t just a shift to optimism—it’s faith in motion.
It’s speaking in a way that opens doors instead of closes them. It opens your mind to opportunities to think of solutions instead of closing them off.
When you lead with that kind of language, you don’t just change conversations—you change outcomes.
Lora had a choice of how to use her language when she was diagnosed with cancer and had a tumor the size of an orange in her head.
Picture this, Lora was married but felt like a frazzled single parent racing all her kids to activities everywhere. While perpetually feeling grubby, lethargic like her energy tank was depleted. Daily dragging herself like a zombie, she wasn’t depressed but her doctors prescribed her anti-depressants.
She refused to take them but also refused to admit that there was something seriously wrong with how she was feeling.
One diagnosis claimed she had Parkinson's.
“Isn’t that an old person's disease? I’m a young mom,” she thought, ”that couldn’t be it”.
She then got a scan that confirmed her worst nightmares were true. It was a brain tumor, camping in her cranium. A squatter who had no rights to be there. Harsh reality set in, I might not survive this.
The doctor scheduled a surgery for 15 days from the moment she found out. This emergency surgery was like a hail mary pass, with a prayer.
She had to decide how to respond in her language, because the realist in her knew in 15 days it all could be over.
“I might be dead, but I might get a miracle and stay alive.” Her worry tried to say, “Mayday! Mayday! T-minus 15! We’re going down!” but Lora turned down the volume on that negative language in her head.
She could have thrown a pity party—aka a “Plom” (Poor Little Old Me) party—inviting everyone she met to join with, “Hi, I’m Lora, lucky we met today because I have a brain tumor and I could be dead in 15 days… How’s your day going?
Yes it is true that sometimes, as Lora says, “life will life you”. It is essential to design language for the situation you face, and define your language rather than just describe what happens to you.
Miraculously, she avoided worry by instead focusing on gratitude. What optimism she could muster, she chose her words wisely. Sometimes she found it easier not to say anything at all. Kind of like Thumper’s motto, “ If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all”
She attended a real estate national conference and chose not to bring it up in conversation. Not all pain is worth passing on.
Later on, people asked,” Why didn’t you tell us?” Her response,
“It was easier to not say something than worry others.”
Because she guarded her tongue, and came out the other side of recovery. That scar on the side of her head is something she can playfully share now.
She chose to speak to herself in healing terms instead of harmful hopelessness. The way she spoke to herself helped her heal from the inside out. The people she listened to and associated with also helped her heal.
What does this mean to you? You probably will not have a brain tumor, like Lora did. I sure hope you don’t!
Ever heard, It’s all in your head? — for Lora, it literally was, A brain tumor threatened her life, but for many of us, the real battle is with the language we carry inside our heads. The way we talk to ourselves, especially about ourselves, can hold us back far more than anything anyone else might say. Positively design that inner language, to manifest what you want in life and you change the lens through which you see your world.
It could be a tumor, but more often the cancerous growth in our head is negativity. Low-frequency language, hurtful words that hush hope, smash self worth whisper worry.
Since we design our language anyway, why not choose things we want instead of things we don’t?
Guidepost #2 Leadership language is focused on ideas Not on People or events.
Ever notice gossip groups gab gregariously about other guys, gals or groups but rarely about useful ideas?
On the other hand, mastermind groups like The Final Percent have shown me that the most meaningful conversations in my life tend to focus on ideas.
"To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it"- Confucius
Kip in his corporate days, helped launch minimum viable software products for some of the biggest companies in the country like AT&T, Apple and various others.
When noticed as he presented across the nations, everyone company felt like they had a unique challenge, some variation of:
“But you don’t know our problem, we’re Unique”
The funny point about this is, everyone’s challenge was the exact same in the process. He said,
“Communication—or more specifically, the language people are using—breaks down every time…People have their own definition of words.”
Communication—or more specifically, the language people are using—breaks down every time. There’s a gap from idea to deliverable that almost guarantees a breakdown in language. The key is to understand that meaning and bridge that gap by discovering what words mean to them, not just to us.
The key is not letting the gap stay a gap. Understand the idea they’re trying to communicate, then build off the frame of reference they’ve chosen so you can negotiate that meaning.”
Describe vs. Design
Describing your life is Passive. It’s simply reporting what’s happening—facts, events, and circumstances—like a sports commentator calling the game from the sidelines. You’re present, but you’re not influencing the outcome.
Designing your life is Active & intentional. It’s choosing the language, framing, and meaning that shape the story as it unfolds. You’re not just narrating—you’re authoring the plot, deciding the direction, and influencing the ending. Describing explains. Designing creates.
Guidepost #3 Pattern recognition, replication & iteration
Just like when you’re learning your first words in a new language, you need to recognize patterns and be able to reproduce them before you can use and create your own iterations. Patterns are especially important when it comes to designing your language—not just recognizing them, but rehearsing them until you can confidently and consistently repeat them. Only then can you iterate, personalize, and truly make them your own.I
The thing about iteration is that it’s rooted in experimentation—you’re tweaking or modifying something to make it better.
But here’s the catch: if you try to fix what’s not really broken—often because you haven’t practiced enough to replicate the original pattern—you’re more likely to break what already works.
For example, as a kid, my parents called me “Baby Destructo.” Why? Let me illustrate: played with toys a bit, differently. I'd take toys like Ninja Turtle action figures and swap their arms, heads, and legs to make them cooler. Almost like a plastic surgeon who used ChatGPT to pass medical school, little by little I "upgraded" my action figures.
Leonardo 2.0 became Leave-Under-the-Door.
Raphael 2.0? More like “Rat Fail
Michelangelo 2.0 became Mike-a-no-go
Donatello 2.0 quickly became Don-NOT-Resuscitate-o.
The problem? They usually ended up in pieces, beyond repair. The iterations became broken.
Recognize patterns or else!
It was the biggest presentation of his life. Kip was presenting the startup sequence for the iPhone. The boardroom had a massive round wooden table, and big-name executives busily filing in— Tim Cook was there, and other top level executives of a little fruit company in California you would all know.
Almost like synchronized swimmers, every single executive popped open a white or silver MacBook in front of them—uniform, polished, it was like the table was suddenly white washed.
Kip started to unzip his bag… and to his horror, The Jaws theme played in his head. What lurked in the shadows of his case? A black IBM ThinkPad. If discovered, It could easily devour this deal.
Panic set in.
How did I miss this!?!
At that moment, it felt more like a Didn’t ThinkPad. In that sea of silver, it would have stuck out like a black sheep at a Genius Bar. A baa baa Bad idea to let anyone see it
He had been called to Apple headquarters—1 Infinite Loop, Cupertino, CA and brought their Biggest competitor’s computer to do the pitch.
What was I thinking!?!
He zipped shut the dangerous deal killing monster in its cage not to escape. Then with quick thinking whiteboarded the concepts for everyone.
It went beautifully, but then he realized he still needed to demonstrate the software, so he bought himself some time by postponing it until the next morning."
Back in his hotel room, he frantically called corporate
“I’m not demonstrating our software tomorrow on anything but a Mac! I don’t care what it takes—get me one ASAP. I’ll stay up all night if needed, but this isn’t a negotiation; it has to happen! ”
By a tiny miracle, the team produced one to his hotel by 4:30 AM that next morning. The final demo was at 8 AM. Kip completed the rebuild on the Apple software and saved the iPhone deal.
Kip even snuck in a jab at Microsoft by having the Demonstration username “Zoonrocks@microsoft.com” on a profile made for Bill Gates.
Luckily recognizing that pattern in time saved their deal with Apple, but what patterns are you missing that could kill your next opportunity?
There are language patterns for your success that are just as important to recognize as that sea of silver Macs.
Patterns in language help us anticipate, infer and understand so that we can confidently communicate.
The adjustments needed are rarely drastic, but recognition of and sufficient repetitions will give you the groundwork to iterate or create your own patterns.
What this means for you is awareness of patterns can break down barriers, build confidence and connect deeper. It can help you avoid awkward situations because you didn’t anticipate the environment.
How do you recognize those patterns before it becomes an issue?
Mentors. Read Books. Listen to Podcasts. Patterns are all around us. Find people who have done what you want and model and mimic them. Seek to understand their model and patterns of language, speaking and communication and it will begin to rub off on you.
Mentors raise your awareness of frameworks, and keep you accountable to rehearse them until you can consistently replicate them.
As you do build familiarity, that familiarity builds confidence.
As confidence rises you can get to the point where you are unconsciously able to replicate the patterns and then it is possible to iterate or create your own patterns.
The biggest caution is don’t try to iterate before you can replicate.
Otherwise, that’s like speaking a new language with such an unintelligible accent that nobody recognizes the words, let alone the ideas you’re trying to convey. It comes out as poorly formed verbal vomit.
Altered actions get altered results, just like modified language creates pigeon language. Seek to clarity first or your message and language will become clouded by confusion.
Understanding the language of success comes with the pattern recognition needed to make a difference in your choices.
So in summary, I encourage you to watch your words—they create your world.
Watch your thoughts, because as Matthew 12:34 says,
“For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”
Fill your head and heart with the language of success, so you can recognize the patterns of success, speak them fluently, and craft your own world with the words you choose to weave.
Design Your Language with Kip & Lora Brown
I had a student once who fell asleep in my class every single day.
Not just head-on-desk asleep—full-on Goodnight Moon mode.
At first, I thought it was all his fault. I blamed, berated and bickered as he kept sawing logs.
Until, I realized… His language development depended on me.
He came up with the strange idea to literally kneel down when he got tired. Some could say he worshiped me.
over the next few classes,It became a reminder that I was putting him to sleep.
Which made me aware of when I was being boring!
The language I was using with him and the class wasn’t engaging enough. Language is much more than just the words we use. “It involves every layer of communication—physical, verbal, and nonverbal.”
When I started creating meaningful experiences that were based on storytelling, activities, and physical engagement strategies he stopped dozing off.
That’s the power of language being approached by more than just words.
Language is not just communicating with others, but it's communicate with yourself.
Design Duo for Life
Kip helped launch the iPhone which has impacted millions of lives,but used to spend over 200 nights a year away from home on average. He was leaving Lora to describe herself as a “married single mother.” He shares how “Life hides the game clock”, and when Lora was diagnosed with brain cancer, the glitz of corporate life lost its sparkle. His priorities radically shifted and their business became first to survive then thrive by designing their life together. They now mentor leaders to design their life, development & language.
"When you design your language with intention, you don't just describe your life--you design it"-Kip & Lora Brown
There are 3 key guideposts to design your language.
Guidepost #1 What you say to yourself is infinitely more important than what anyone else can say to you.
The way we craft our language matters.
Especially what is communicated out of our mouths to others and what is kept inside our head.
For Kip, “Worry is the highest form of consciousness”—it’s like pleading for problems to persist or praying for them to come true. Your brain doesn’t want to make you a liar. Every word you speak—positive or negative—is like sending it to the filing cabinet in your mind to pull out evidence that proves you right. So when you worry, your brain faithfully gathers proof and arranges the pieces of your life to make that worry a reality.
Quick tip: Instead of focusing on what you don’t want, just focus on what you do. Kip said, try NOT to think of the color blue. Guess what it isn’t possible for us to NOT think of blue because of needing to process that association. But if you rephrase it and have people think about Red Only, can you see how that will get the result you want, while moving forward?
Worry keeps your mind hyper-focused on worst-case scenarios, rehearsing failure instead of creating solutions, is actively creating chaos in the mind instead of calm.
Creative leadership language flips that script.
It’s about crafting possibilities with your words, replacing
[I can’t] with [How could I]
[The deadline can’t be met]… with [This is what we CAN do.]
This isn’t just a shift to optimism—it’s faith in motion.
It’s speaking in a way that opens doors instead of closes them. It opens your mind to opportunities to think of solutions instead of closing them off.
When you lead with that kind of language, you don’t just change conversations—you change outcomes.
Lora had a choice of how to use her language when she was diagnosed with cancer and had a tumor the size of an orange in her head.
Picture this, Lora was married but felt like a frazzled single parent racing all her kids to activities everywhere. While perpetually feeling grubby, lethargic like her energy tank was depleted. Daily dragging herself like a zombie, she wasn’t depressed but her doctors prescribed her anti-depressants.
She refused to take them but also refused to admit that there was something seriously wrong with how she was feeling.
One diagnosis claimed she had Parkinson's.
“Isn’t that an old person's disease? I’m a young mom,” she thought, ”that couldn’t be it”.
She then got a scan that confirmed her worst nightmares were true. It was a brain tumor, camping in her cranium. A squatter who had no rights to be there. Harsh reality set in, I might not survive this.
The doctor scheduled a surgery for 15 days from the moment she found out. This emergency surgery was like a hail mary pass, with a prayer.
She had to decide how to respond in her language, because the realist in her knew in 15 days it all could be over.
“I might be dead, but I might get a miracle and stay alive.” Her worry tried to say, “Mayday! Mayday! T-minus 15! We’re going down!” but Lora turned down the volume on that negative language in her head.
She could have thrown a pity party—aka a “Plom” (Poor Little Old Me) party—inviting everyone she met to join with, “Hi, I’m Lora, lucky we met today because I have a brain tumor and I could be dead in 15 days… How’s your day going?
Yes it is true that sometimes, as Lora says, “life will life you”. It is essential to design language for the situation you face, and define your language rather than just describe what happens to you.
Miraculously, she avoided worry by instead focusing on gratitude. What optimism she could muster, she chose her words wisely. Sometimes she found it easier not to say anything at all. Kind of like Thumper’s motto, “ If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all”
She attended a real estate national conference and chose not to bring it up in conversation. Not all pain is worth passing on.
Later on, people asked,” Why didn’t you tell us?” Her response,
“It was easier to not say something than worry others.”
Because she guarded her tongue, and came out the other side of recovery. That scar on the side of her head is something she can playfully share now.
She chose to speak to herself in healing terms instead of harmful hopelessness. The way she spoke to herself helped her heal from the inside out. The people she listened to and associated with also helped her heal.
What does this mean to you? You probably will not have a brain tumor, like Lora did. I sure hope you don’t!
Ever heard, It’s all in your head? — for Lora, it literally was, A brain tumor threatened her life, but for many of us, the real battle is with the language we carry inside our heads. The way we talk to ourselves, especially about ourselves, can hold us back far more than anything anyone else might say. Positively design that inner language, to manifest what you want in life and you change the lens through which you see your world.
It could be a tumor, but more often the cancerous growth in our head is negativity. Low-frequency language, hurtful words that hush hope, smash self worth whisper worry.
Since we design our language anyway, why not choose things we want instead of things we don’t?
Guidepost #2 Leadership language is focused on ideas Not on People or events.
Ever notice gossip groups gab gregariously about other guys, gals or groups but rarely about useful ideas?
On the other hand, mastermind groups like The Final Percent have shown me that the most meaningful conversations in my life tend to focus on ideas.
"To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it"- Confucius
Kip in his corporate days, helped launch minimum viable software products for some of the biggest companies in the country like AT&T, Apple and various others.
When noticed as he presented across the nations, everyone company felt like they had a unique challenge, some variation of:
“But you don’t know our problem, we’re Unique”
The funny point about this is, everyone’s challenge was the exact same in the process. He said,
“Communication—or more specifically, the language people are using—breaks down every time…People have their own definition of words.”
Communication—or more specifically, the language people are using—breaks down every time. There’s a gap from idea to deliverable that almost guarantees a breakdown in language. The key is to understand that meaning and bridge that gap by discovering what words mean to them, not just to us.
The key is not letting the gap stay a gap. Understand the idea they’re trying to communicate, then build off the frame of reference they’ve chosen so you can negotiate that meaning.”
Describe vs. Design
Describing your life is Passive. It’s simply reporting what’s happening—facts, events, and circumstances—like a sports commentator calling the game from the sidelines. You’re present, but you’re not influencing the outcome.
Designing your life is Active & intentional. It’s choosing the language, framing, and meaning that shape the story as it unfolds. You’re not just narrating—you’re authoring the plot, deciding the direction, and influencing the ending. Describing explains. Designing creates.
Guidepost #3 Pattern recognition, replication & iteration
Just like when you’re learning your first words in a new language, you need to recognize patterns and be able to reproduce them before you can use and create your own iterations. Patterns are especially important when it comes to designing your language—not just recognizing them, but rehearsing them until you can confidently and consistently repeat them. Only then can you iterate, personalize, and truly make them your own.I
The thing about iteration is that it’s rooted in experimentation—you’re tweaking or modifying something to make it better.
But here’s the catch: if you try to fix what’s not really broken—often because you haven’t practiced enough to replicate the original pattern—you’re more likely to break what already works.
For example, as a kid, my parents called me “Baby Destructo.” Why? Let me illustrate: played with toys a bit, differently. I'd take toys like Ninja Turtle action figures and swap their arms, heads, and legs to make them cooler. Almost like a plastic surgeon who used ChatGPT to pass medical school, little by little I "upgraded" my action figures.
Leonardo 2.0 became Leave-Under-the-Door.
Raphael 2.0? More like “Rat Fail
Michelangelo 2.0 became Mike-a-no-go
Donatello 2.0 quickly became Don-NOT-Resuscitate-o.
The problem? They usually ended up in pieces, beyond repair. The iterations became broken.
Recognize patterns or else!
It was the biggest presentation of his life. Kip was presenting the startup sequence for the iPhone. The boardroom had a massive round wooden table, and big-name executives busily filing in— Tim Cook was there, and other top level executives of a little fruit company in California you would all know.
Almost like synchronized swimmers, every single executive popped open a white or silver MacBook in front of them—uniform, polished, it was like the table was suddenly white washed.
Kip started to unzip his bag… and to his horror, The Jaws theme played in his head. What lurked in the shadows of his case? A black IBM ThinkPad. If discovered, It could easily devour this deal.
Panic set in.
How did I miss this!?!
At that moment, it felt more like a Didn’t ThinkPad. In that sea of silver, it would have stuck out like a black sheep at a Genius Bar. A baa baa Bad idea to let anyone see it
He had been called to Apple headquarters—1 Infinite Loop, Cupertino, CA and brought their Biggest competitor’s computer to do the pitch.
What was I thinking!?!
He zipped shut the dangerous deal killing monster in its cage not to escape. Then with quick thinking whiteboarded the concepts for everyone.
It went beautifully, but then he realized he still needed to demonstrate the software, so he bought himself some time by postponing it until the next morning."
Back in his hotel room, he frantically called corporate
“I’m not demonstrating our software tomorrow on anything but a Mac! I don’t care what it takes—get me one ASAP. I’ll stay up all night if needed, but this isn’t a negotiation; it has to happen! ”
By a tiny miracle, the team produced one to his hotel by 4:30 AM that next morning. The final demo was at 8 AM. Kip completed the rebuild on the Apple software and saved the iPhone deal.
Kip even snuck in a jab at Microsoft by having the Demonstration username “Zoonrocks@microsoft.com” on a profile made for Bill Gates.
Luckily recognizing that pattern in time saved their deal with Apple, but what patterns are you missing that could kill your next opportunity?
There are language patterns for your success that are just as important to recognize as that sea of silver Macs.
Patterns in language help us anticipate, infer and understand so that we can confidently communicate.
The adjustments needed are rarely drastic, but recognition of and sufficient repetitions will give you the groundwork to iterate or create your own patterns.
What this means for you is awareness of patterns can break down barriers, build confidence and connect deeper. It can help you avoid awkward situations because you didn’t anticipate the environment.
How do you recognize those patterns before it becomes an issue?
Mentors. Read Books. Listen to Podcasts. Patterns are all around us. Find people who have done what you want and model and mimic them. Seek to understand their model and patterns of language, speaking and communication and it will begin to rub off on you.
Mentors raise your awareness of frameworks, and keep you accountable to rehearse them until you can consistently replicate them.
As you do build familiarity, that familiarity builds confidence.
As confidence rises you can get to the point where you are unconsciously able to replicate the patterns and then it is possible to iterate or create your own patterns.
The biggest caution is don’t try to iterate before you can replicate.
Otherwise, that’s like speaking a new language with such an unintelligible accent that nobody recognizes the words, let alone the ideas you’re trying to convey. It comes out as poorly formed verbal vomit.
Altered actions get altered results, just like modified language creates pigeon language. Seek to clarity first or your message and language will become clouded by confusion.
Understanding the language of success comes with the pattern recognition needed to make a difference in your choices.
So in summary, I encourage you to watch your words—they create your world.
Watch your thoughts, because as Matthew 12:34 says,
“For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”
Fill your head and heart with the language of success, so you can recognize the patterns of success, speak them fluently, and craft your own world with the words you choose to weave.
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Last Updated: August 11, 2025
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Are YOU an artist?
A stormy June breeze wafted in behind my family as we “strollered” our way into the 437CO gallery off Main Street in Grand Junction to see the “Strength & Fragility” Exhibit by Ajay Gustafson.
Greeted warmly by Ajay and her lovely family beside her and behind her hung on the walls.
Immediately, I felt like I was getting an intimate look into what was most important to her.
Ajay's art didn’t highlight the sweeping drama of broken arms. She didn’t plaster the canvas with visceral violence of siblings pulling hair. Or the disturbing reality of life in a back seat with disheveled Cheerio caked car carpets so well known to parents.
No glitzy cars.
No magnificent mansions.
No sleek lines of high-heeled high-brow fashion so common on social media.
Instead, I felt whisked away to a humble home life full of love & cherished heartfelt scrapbook memories. The idyllic vision of motherhood after the mess is cleaned up. I saw a highlighted hope of humanity, simplified through the eyes of a mother and her children. Sensitive simple moments that make you remember to notice you are alive.
The subtle scenes were a contemporary & balanced breath of fresh air. Her homey style has a soft impressionistic feel almost like you slightly took a camera out of focus, or blurred your eyes for a moment, this allowed the edges ever so lightly to haze. Which for me allowed my imagination to fill in the blanks. The soft pastel light reflecting off warm hazy wholesome shapes. It is the calm before the storm and amidst the storm. Which for me reminded me of Live Photos on my iPhone where most of the frames have screaming, or kids not looking but for one millisecond everyone is content and smiling or at least present.
The moments she captured were moments of meaning almost like you opened up a polaroid photo album on a coffee table and found joy gazing in her scrapbook. Stories still kept alive which could have faded or easily been passed up but left you thinking.
Which memories would I frame?
Imagine your own moments distilled from a lifetime of capturing flickers of light in imagination. Which anchoring meaningful memories would you capture one soft stroke of oil on canvas at a time?
Ajay’s paintings had some wonderful examples:
Sticky sweet popsicles melting over your hand on a summer day.
Her son winning his sister at Risk and cheering triumphantly.
A father carefully bathing his baby boy for the first time.
Snapshots.
Shared heartbeats.
Where do you invest your heartbeats?
I whisper kisses on my child's bouncing forehead off my lips as I listen to Ajay share the backstory of her pieces accompanied by a momentary hailstorm. Whimpering winds pressing a tree rhythmically against the window as if it was saying “I want to see too.”
Suddenly ping pong ball sized hail pelted the window, and sidewalk. Yet we were safe and warm inside. The storm urgently knocked so loudly Ajay needed to speak up so we could hear why she chose these moments but then she quipped, to the audience.
“A little weather for drama”-AjayGustafson
Ephemeral moments like this you would have had to be there to experience.
“All these photos are through my eyes” Ajay said, and I realized as an artist yes we get to help others see what we see, feel what we feel and impress others through art. She expressed how artists have to ‘believe deep down that what we do truly matters’, that it’s significant.
Which made me think of my STORY framework, Who gets to tell you what is significant and what isn’t?
What you hang as your story and what is just a moment to be forgotten. Significance is the core of your story. Some moments matter more than others because we endow them with meaning. As we make it mean something we make it significant.
Moments of our lives sometimes fall like dust on a mantle, they accumulate, but if not recorded, are lost when it isn’t meaningful.
Art isn’t created—it’s witnessed & passionately captured
I was once encouraged to not focus on creating content instead to document things that inspire me. So If I take that a bit further Art is not in the creation but in the capturing of moments.
Yesterday, as I pondered the simple sweet sensations captured in my friend’s art, I was swept away to a memory my mother took with a camera and had commissioned and commemorated into a sketch.
It was me as a baby boy bathing in the back porch sink.
Art connects us
We lost her last June to cancer. That sketch lets me see myself through her eyes again.
I have an almost two year old sink bather of my own now. Art is a little different from reality because we miss the moment before and after. A tender treasured moment for me is often juxtaposed by uncontrollable piercing baby screams. A frantic wrestling with the faucet to find the temperature. Then the toddler flinging food bits on the floor knocking over dishes. Him "helping to unload" the dishwasher, which means a half hour of cleaning up a melamine bowl shattered like a bomb went off. Strong-arming the squirming slippery, salamander-smooth skinned sink bather. But for a milisecond life becomes art. That is what I see in this artwork.
Ajay says these moments together are called “Strength and Fragility”.
She has had some critics say her paintings are “fractured” but she disagrees, “because to be fractured means that they at some point were to be whole”.
The melamine bowl was fractured—shattered in an instant. But her art is more like the baby: not broken, not whole, but beautifully complex. A living, breathing moment held together by tenderness, not perfection.
For me, her work reveals a quiet tension—resilience intertwined with tenderness, each brushstroke balancing strength with vulnerability.
It reminds me of the strength a father has to have to restrain his boy like a football gripped tightly over the sink to hose him down with spaghetti meat sauce screams mixed with giggles. It’s a messy but essential part of life to take care of those that can’t take care of themselves.
I’m inspired to capture little moments that make life meaningful. It’s all within eyeshot if you can take notice.
As my artist grandfather Leonard Parkin often said, “The imagination is a place”.
After those moments pass it is that place of imagination we can visit to rewind the clock. Only there we can embrace memories as reality again. It is the place where we can select which image is on our life photo.
While I was in the gallery, I was asked a simple but profound question by a local sculptor. It actually inspired me to write this.
He said, “ Are you an artist?”
When did we stop saying yes immediately to being an artist?
Why do we feel the need to qualify the yes?
For whatever reason I felt I needed to qualify why I'm a performing artist, a speaker. Why didn’t I immediately say yes? I believe we can all choose to be artists. We all have the opportunity to be artists, poets, actors and speakers who express ourselves through multiple mediums.
For me, words are my paint, speaking my gallery, my life the masterpiece. Our life is a masterpiece in the making.
It isn’t just what you DO that makes you an artist, it is a means of expressing yourself.
Artists seek self expression and that is something that I am passionate about on and off stage.
I love impacting others to also live their masterpiece lives. To drink in inspiration, document discoveries, witness the whimsical and say “hail yeah!” to the storms of life. I’ve noticed as we cherish inspiration, God will know we are trustworthy to receive more of it.
So if you choose to be an artist remember it isn’t just about the fruits, It isn’t just what you paint, or sculpt or say that the world sees. Your measure as an artist is who you become. How you leave this world a little brighter, a little better, a little more thoughtful than how you found it. It is how you add color, texture, organization and passion to your life and help others see too. Artists GIVE vision they don’t just have vision. Anyone can have a vision. True Artists inspire vision out of others by vulnerably sharing their own. How you express the talents that God has given you, and you have chosen to develop qualify you to be an artist. So am I an artist? YES!
Don’t leave the world the same. I encourage you to paint your masterpieces. Please for yourself, live your masterpiece life.
So I will ask you again, Are YOU an artist?
Connect with Brigham
https://linktr.ee/brighamblackham
Go See for Yourself:
https://www.coloradomesa.edu/art/gallery/index.html
@ajay_gustafson_painting
W.I.N. Don’t wait to play handball My Tribute to “Doc” Michael King
(For Doc's Queen Laurie.)
Ever felt like you had unfinished business?
Well—I missed out on "the perfect game" with my friend Doc because I thought I would have another week.
Mentoring is an act of love, and I think that the growth you see in someone is what makes it worth the time you invest in them. Let me share with you about one of my first protégés from Toastmasters.
November 26th, 2004, was a Tuesday morning. We used to meet as Toastmasters in the Four Winds coffee shop on Bookcliff in Grand Junction at 7 a.m. In walked a short gentleman in a Kansas City Chiefs white button-down shirt, toting a briefcase, and with a cartoon-like zeal and excitement for life.
“Hi, I’m Doc!” he cheerfully greated everyone.
I replied a bit like bugs bunny,
“What’s up Doc?!
I knew at that moment we would become good friends.
Michael—"Doc"—King was a great fit for our Grand Junction Toastmasters club. He played full out and participated joyfully from day one. He always had something to say, and in those first couple of months, he was able to dial back his filler words because he was a master at the "umms" and motormouthing.
I thoroughly enjoyed interfacing with him and seeing him come into his own. In the beginning, he had a challenge with cramming thirty minutes of content into seven minutes Speech. He sped along like an auctioneer rattling off cattle.
Doc’s Icebreaker speech, where he gave us his origin story of how he became known as "Doc", had one moment that still makes me smile. He displayed pictures of different doctors like Spiderman’s Doc Oc, Dr. Strange, and Doc the Dwarf from Snow White. Then he asked us the million dollar question…
“which one do I look like?“
As he struck the same pose and expression of Doc from Snow White.
We all laughed.
I always enjoyed his cheery demeanor and his ability to bring a smile to everyone’s face. His shuffle of excitement and that neighborly mustache made it seem like he always had a wise story to share.
I had met with him only twice outside of Toastmasters—at the Barnes & Noble to hear about what he wanted to do and see how I could help him. I was his mentor but I found quickly that he would share insights that would coach me right back.
He shared how proud he was of his boy, who was passionate about rock crawling.
I shared with him about my passion for coaching storytelling, and he leveraged the insights I gave him to make his speeches better and better.
He did the work to grow and I was so proud of him.
On one occasion, he even gave me feedback on the rough draft of my book “3 Reasons Stage Fright Costs and Why You Must Fix It.” He shared one of his favorite quotes with me: the acronym W.I.N.
“What’s Important Now?” —Lou Holtz.
That quote now has taken on a much deeper meaning recently.
He was so generous with his time and loved to serve. You could tell by how he walked into a room that he was approachable and friendly.
However, watching his rapid feedback as he dialed in his speaking ability with constructive feedback he implemented was inspiring.
He told me the first day I met him,
“I just want to have more intellectual conversations.”
He definitely accomplished that. We never had low-level conversations about people or events—we always spoke about concepts that inspired him. I loved his childlike curiosity and enjoyment of sharing it with others.
Whenever you spoke to him, you came away with a sense that he was a genuinely kind person who loved his queen and was a follower of Christ. He just loved people.
I remember on more than one occasion he shared insights from one of his favorite books: Who Moved My Cheese by Spencer Johnson—the story of little mouse-like creatures whose cheese supply runs out and they have to search for new cheese. Their trials and tribulations with transforming who they were into who they wanted to be. I was only recently reminded of how powerful encouragements to move and find your cheese really are. To follow your passions.
“When you move beyond your fear, you feel free.”--Spencer Johnson
That book will forever remind me of Doc. Because in the beginning, he may have felt like his cheese was moved. Life didn’t treat him fairly. But in the end, he not only found his cheese—he was able to provide it for others, emotionally and spiritually. He became a friend, and I was honored to help write his obituary with his wife.
After only six months—May 20th 2025—I witnessed my friend and fellow Toastmaster Doc give the best speech I had ever seen him give. He called it “The Perfect Game.” It reminded me of an adult version of show-and-tell.
Picture Doc in his glasses as he excitedly donned tight athletic shorts, gloves, and a handball headband. He bounced the handball and compared it to a racquetball, and his palpable excitement was electric.
His hobby truly revealed his passion. It helped me see that I had passed a handball court dozens of times in a local park and never knew it. For him and his friends, it was “the perfect game.” He was so persuasive, I immediately told him I wanted to play with him. I needed to play some handball with him as soon as possible.
We set a date for the Tuesday following Memorial Day.
We had a plan: Tuesday after Memorial Day. I would be back for Toastmasters, then go play.
But plans changed with Family on memorial day and I wasn’t able to make it back in time.
I told him how I went to Moroni, Ut to visit family and my mom’s grave.
He told me he wished he was closer to his parents, who were buried in Kansas City.
I texted him saying we needed to reschedule.
I missed his text saying he had a court reserved for us on Wednesday.
I never confirmed.
All I know is—he may have played handball, but not with me.
I knew we would pick it up when I was back the following Tuesday.
Then I got a text from his phone, but it wasn’t him…
“Brigham, this is Michael's wife. I wanted to let you know that he passed unexpectedly yesterday. He died peacefully in his sleep. I know he enjoyed his time with Toastmasters. It was a good outlet for him.”
As my friend Kip Brown says:
“Life hides the game clock.”
We don’t know when we’ll get the two-minute warning—or if we’re already at halftime.
We just have this moment.
I hope you don’t miss your opportunity to play handball like I did.
I know I’ll see Doc again, and he is still one of my dear friends.
I’m going to make Doc proud and earn my cheese like he did.
I am confident he knows I cared about him and was proud of him.
I hope I can take this opportunity to cherish the moments—and not wait for the next week to play handball.
Because next week… isn’t guaranteed.
What’s important Now?
Ecclesiastes 3:1-4
“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;”
I know this: No good man—like Doc—is ever truly taken before his time.
God has a plan for each of us, and He loves us deeply.
Though Doc’s time may have felt short to us, it was perfectly aligned with God’s divine timetable.
He was “taken home to that God who gave [him] life.” (Alma 40:11)
Helpful scripture references:
2 Timothy 4:7–8 [Doc] …”fought a good fight… finished [his]course… [&] kept the faith”
Alma 40:11–12
11 Now, concerning the state of the soul between death and the resurrection—Behold, it has been made known unto me by an angel, that the spirits of all men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life.
12 And then shall it come to pass, that the spirits of those who are righteous are received into a state of happiness, which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, where they shall rest from all their troubles and from all care, and sorrow.
** June 6th 2025 I was able to give this tribute talk to the family of Doc at his funeral.
I added how he really did know how to W.I.N.
I will never forget just how Doc made me feel.
I met his handball friends and was able to set up a handball game for Monday, So I won't let another week pass without doing the work I know I need to do.
You never know how people can be brought together, but I met his sons, his neighbors, his lovely Queen Laurie. From the bottom of my heart I hope that this honors his memory and we will be able to keep his memory alive always. God Bless!
Sam Rifkin has been a personal trainer and now his passion is to be a “person trainer.”
His mission is much deeper than getting men muscles and making them look jacked and juicy, shredded and sexy. His vitality is fuel. His passion is leveraging his body as an example for others to level up their lives too.
Vitality will impact all areas of your life. Your body is only as formidable as your mind. We are not talking about being a meat head, but to build M.I.N.D. muscle. These principles are universal and can be applied in any endeavor you set your focus to.
M.I.N.D. is the framework to get gains in your mental fortitude, to gear up to do hard things and live into your fullest mind-body connection.
Sam is a serial entrepreneur who believes we were all deposited on this earth to be examples. Not just in what we do, but in who we are. After all we are human beings, not just human doings. This mind body connection is exactly what you need to see farther, put the mind behind the muscle and gain confidence to choose your hard. We do difficult things and as a fellow Gamma Man Sam has an uncanny ability to do the work and he uncommonly cares.
M-Mastery I-Inspiration N-Non-Negotiable D-Discipline
M is for Mastery
Boredom is where mastery lives.
Mastery is the ability to live in the boredom of the basics—until inspiration emerges from consistent preparation. Masters have practiced the fundamentals so thoroughly, they’ve forgotten more than most will ever learn. Their wisdom is earned through experience and discipline—not by getting it right, but by making it impossible to get it wrong.
Practice makes permanent.
And perfect practice makes mastery possible.
Masters lead by example because they do the basics better. They stay focused on fundamentals. They train themselves to love the work—paying attention to nuance, repetition, and rhythm. They own their mindset and embrace every layer of who they are in their chosen craft.
Training yourself to love what seems boring is a defining trait of a master.
“Don’t get cute.” — Sam Rifkin
Sam warns against changing things up just to be clever. Flashy tweaks and shortcuts waste time—and can even cause harm. His advice? Know your basis. Know your ground. Know your foundation. Make a plan. Stick to it. Focus on meaningful progress, not pointless rigamarole. Mastery comes from paying your dues—doing the work, not chasing distractions. Mastery is built through reps, refined by form, sustained by discipline, and elevated by playfulness.
As Bruce Lee said:
“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.”
Mastery is about perfection in the sense that you complete what you start.
Perfection—wánměi (完美) in Chinese and telios (τέλειος) in Greek—doesn’t mean flawlessness, but completion, wholeness, and reaching one's intended purpose.
I is for Inspiration
胜人者有力，自胜者强。
He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty.”
Laozi (Lao Tzu)
From a young age, Sam has been known as the “resident hype man.” However, after joining The Final Percent, his role evolved from simply motivating others to truly inspiring them. Inspiration, unlike hype, is a daily choice. It’s found in the unseen work you do when no one is watching. That “shadow work” eventually comes to light as it compounds into real progress.
It’s taken Sam years to build the systems, organization, and processes that allow him to inspire others. But before he could do that, he had to learn to inspire himself—to take bold chances and choose to live with intention and visibility.
Why is inspiring others more impactful than hype?
Inspiration can be as simple as taking a moment to celebrate your progress, no matter how small. It requires acknowledging your wins. It’s about identifying the gap between where you are and where you want to be—and then choosing to surround yourself with people who have already crossed that gap. You fill your mind with examples, with proof that it’s possible—and protect your energy from those who diminish your dreams.
“I don't want to be friends with a ‘there's nothin’ I can do’ kind of guy.” — Sam Rifkin
This is key: Inspiration often happens through association. You must guard your mind and your time from people who say things like “It’s just the way it is.” Inspiration is the conscious decision to seek out role models, to live as an example out loud, and to create more examples and success stories for others to follow.
N is for Non-negotiables
"Show me your minimums and I'll show you your future." — Rob Sperry
Non-negotiables are the minimums, the floors, the things that you will do on your WORST day no matter what. Hugh Zaretsky is always speaking of Consistent Daily Actions or CDAs. Some will think of these as valleys or the pits are not where the growth is, but it is what you do when every fiber of your being wants to quit that determines your destiny.
Whatever you are willing to do on your worst day—that will determine your significance and impact on this world. When it’s cold, you’re sore, it is inconvenient and you don’t want to go. You do it anyway.
Do you start negotiating with yourself and justify why you don’t have to do it this time, you will make up for it later? BS! That is just your current Belief System. What were you thinking? Sam discussed how you have to develop a personal code of conduct.
I agree with him—we all need to have a code and live by it.
Just like Ancient Japanese Samurai lived by the Bushido code, or Boy Scouts lived by the Scout Oath, Motto, and a Scout Law. Whatever your organization is, does it have a moral compass? And when it comes to your approach to life and your profession, do you have standards established? Have you adopted a code and made it yours? Or is that code held at arm's length, still someone else’s? Ownership of the code doesn’t have anything to do with whether you wrote it. If you choose to live by it, you will gain value from it.
"The easy route eventually becomes the hard route. Face your challenges head-on or the detours will multiply." — Sam Rifkin
Again, Non-Negotiables become hard to recognize when there are people who do not resonate with your values. Stand up for yourself. If your association isn’t helping you live your non-negotiables, ask yourself: Do you want your vision or do you want your comfort?
"We all need to choose to do hard things"
Sam Rifkin
Hard things are the way to sacrifice and get your hardships out of the way on your terms.
Sam reminded me of a powerful story from The Art of Significance by Dan Clark. Dan visited professional football teams across the country and used a simple object lesson to challenge their perception of effort and expectations.
He’d take a broomstick, hold it out just a foot off the ground, and invite the fastest, most athletic player in the room to jump over it. The player would typically scoff, easily clear the bar with minimal effort—and only by a few inches.
Then came the real question:
“Why did you only jump that high?”
Without fail, the answer was:
“Because you didn’t ask me to jump higher.”
Everyone in the room—coaches, teammates—knew that player could easily leap three feet or more. But because the bar was set low, so was the effort.
The lesson?
People often rise—or fall—to the level of expectation. If you want greatness, set the bar high. Not just for others—but for yourself.
Who are you negotiating with? You are the best salesman for yourself. Just like Sam taught me,
"Stop trying to make weak deals with yourself!"
Living by your non-negotiables helps you learn yourself. All of us, to truly build MIND Muscle, need to know our body.
Sam shared a great example of not just blindly following but emulating the things that you want to accomplish from the people who have results you want. Then and only then, after modeling other successful people like that, can you create your own version of your routine.
D is for Discipline
“Discipline shares its root with ‘disciple’—so who or what are you following? Your future is forged by the righteous routines and daily disciplines you choose to be devoted to.” — Brigham Blackham
MIND Muscle is the mental framework that powers mastery—built through discipline, sustained by inspiration, and protected by non-negotiables. It’s the choice to love the basics, to find meaning in repetition, and to stay committed long after motivation fades. Mastery lives in the details, where form meets focus and preparation becomes power. Inspiration isn’t hype—it’s the quiet, daily decision to keep showing up, to do the work, and to become so consistent that excellence is no longer optional—it’s automatic.
Book a call with me:
thefinalpercent.com/BrighamBlackham
Wait, we need to wear weighted vests for the whole Gamma Group event?
My mind is racing, I'm not in boy scouts anymore!
I’m surrounded by powerful men who I respect and have been able to get to know over the years in The Final Percent’s events. This event is men only, the challenges are rougher, the experience is a rare chance to grow through challenges. We aren't happy clappy gathering around a campfire singing, we are about to forge a bond over doing hard Things together. This is a brotherhood being pressed together.
On Day one we were broken up into small groups of 6 and appointed group leads. Each group was given a 30-50 lbs weighted vest someone had to be wearing the whole weekend while we were awake. No exceptions, the weight needed to be carried by someone in the group at all times. The leader was expected to bear the weight and share the weight.
Leadership is a load of responsibility. Then it hits me that load-bearing leadership is more than carrying the weight all by yourself; it is the ability to know when to not only lift it but to know when to pass it. Leadership isn’t about waiting to have people tell you what to do, It's about bearing, sharing and not dropping the weight. Load bearing leaders don’t wait to take the weight, they bear the load and entrust others at times to lift where they can. Load-bearing leadership is donning the responsibility to take the load and entrust others to offload it at times. It is taking back responsibility if the load is unbearable to subordinates. The real weight of leadership isn’t just about shouldering everything alone however It’s about knowing when to bear it—and when to share it.
"Load-bearing leaders don’t carry everything—they carry what counts. They leverage strength, take full ownership, live in alignment, and distribute the weight to empower others.”-Brigham Blackham
Leaders need to be vigilant when they pass that weight because just like a load bearing wall, poor passing of the weight of responsibility can crack an organisation like a wall.
“If architects want to strengthen a decrepit arch, they increase the load which is laid upon it—for thereby the parts are joined more firmly together.”
—Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
Just like how without a load bearing Keystone an arch crumbles, What is your keystone?
Leadership isn’t about holding a title—it’s about holding weight. Real leadership is load-bearing. It’s about carrying pressure, navigating resistance, and protecting the people and purpose entrusted to you.
Introducing Dr. Greg Kimble, self-proclaimed "head Intern," is a leader who doesn’t need a title to make an impact. He goes the final percent in every area of life—professionally, personally, in his vitality, and in his community. In other words he is the example. There is nobody. better to help you gather the value loaded in this framework that him.
Load-bearing leadership rests on four laws.
This L.O.A.D. framework. is the law of leverage, the law of ownership, the law of alignment and the law of distribution.
L — Leverage
Leverage is what allows a leader to lift heavy loads—not by brute strength alone, but by wisely applying pressure in the right places, at the right time, with the right support.
“The ultimate Leverage we have is Community”- Dr. Greg Kimble
Leverage is created with intentionality. Are you like the barrel chested competitive strongman who will pick up 333 lbs atlas stone and hoist it onto a 33’platform by brute strength alone?
At times that may be metaphorically called for, but if you understand the law of leverage, More often than not, there is a better way. The weight needs to be lifted but what about rigging up the stone to a pulley system, or using a forklift, or banding together to bear it up? As my biometric specialist and hyroc’s champion friend Gunther Klaus says,“work smarter so you can go harder.”
Use each weight like a rep in the gym. The weight of leadership will tear you up, weigh you down but that turmoil will build you up.
It’s not adversity, it's resistance. The pressure, heat and time is what forms you into a strong leader like a diamond is formed. The law of leverage is putting pressure in the right places, and being resourceful when resources are scarce. Doing what is necessary to lift, the load. Resistance either builds us or breaks us.
Leverage isn’t about lifting alone—it’s about using community, faith, systems, and mindset to lift what could crush you by yourself.
Dr. Greg Kimble—dynamic, soulful motown singer but for years people pressed him–You’ve got to go through adversity to really sing the blues.
Greg has a real problem with that, it isn’t about adversity. “You don’t have to be heartbroken to sing the blues—you just need to learn the song.”
You don’t need trauma to be trustworthy.
You don’t need to fall apart to develop strength.
You don’t need to be crushed to carry the weight.
What if we did like what greg suggested and just learned the song?
“Don’t wish it were easier. Wish you were better.” – Jim Rohn
O — Ownership
“Ownership is Simply Example”--Dr. Greg Kimble
Ownership is the act of radical responsibility—choosing to claim agency over your actions, outcomes, and even your attitude, regardless of external circumstances. Rising up to be the example instead of the warning. It’s not just about taking credit when things go well or accepting blame when they don’t—true ownership is knowing the buck stops with me.
Greg shared about how Bernard Quisumbing didn’t join TFP in the early days because he didn’t feel like Greg matched his preaching yet. The concepts were great but they didn’t match his actions fully. Bernard told Greg, ’You told people to eat healthy—but you weren’t living it.” to Bernard’s point Greg even ballooned up over 233lbs while Cayla was pregnant. “ I had all the pregnancy cravings” and his waste line showed it, he had to own those choices.
He had recognized he was a warning for others when he got after his team for giving him a shirt that fit too tight thinking that they gave him a medium when in fact is was an XL. He made a massive shift. A decision. He made a choice to become the example,but when he took his health to the next level his Example became the attraction to the message.
Three years later he is in the best shape of his life and just recently his assistant Rebecca shared with Greg just how astonishing it is how often men come up to him to talk about his body.
At his last event, he had many of the gentlemen eating at his table refuse to order until they saw what Greg ordered. That is what you call setting the standard and owning your results.
So many of these men were asking “how do I get a body like yours” but when he tested them on if they were serious by going to the original Golds Gym to skip out on a pool party exactly nobody came to join him. Ownership can be lonely and can be frustrating. What that means is the buck stops with you.
When people say “how do I get results like you” Greg claims they are asking the wrong question. The question could be what are you doing to get results like that. And Who do you have to become to have standards like that? It is all about the What.
Something I have heard over and over is that when you have boundaries and standards, they do not require anyone else’s participation. If my discipline stirs up your insecurities, let that inspire action not shame, or get stuck in the comparative reality of blame.
Here is the long and short of it, if we clearly see what we are building and see what it takes and do the actions to get there consistently, we are owning our results. We need mentors who know the way, go the way and show the way so we can remove our blindspots and make consistent progress.
Caution: “if someone tells you what to do without asking first what you're trying to do they are just trying to sell you something.”-Dr. Greg Kimble
Isn’t it interesting how most people are looking to be in the spotlight but neglect to create a legacy of their life that will live in the history books? I don I want to be in the history books not the headlines.
Own your outcomes and you give permission to your followers to do the same.
A — Alignment
Alignment is the harmony between your inner world and outer impact—where your beliefs, behaviors, and becoming are synchronized across all areas of your personal, professional, vitality and community.
It truly is Be+ Do = Have.
It's living in such a way that your faith, purpose, and priorities are not competing—but cooperating with synergy.
Christ modeled this perfectly:
"And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man." (Luke 2:52)
Christ grew mentally *Professionally (wisdom), physically *vitality-(stature), spiritually *Personal (favor with God), and socially*Community (favor with man). That’s holistic alignment and we use the Infinity model in The Final Percent to give you a holistic approach to personal development.
There’s no such thing as perfect alignment in leadership. If you're waiting for 100%, you’ll never move. Hugh Zaretsky taught me: “if you’re 70-80% aligned with what you want—do it.”
Alignment isn’t about agreement from everyone—it’s about clarity within yourself. Boundaries protect that clarity, and your boundaries are your chosen standards.
“My boundaries don’t require your participation.”-Dr. Greg Kimble
When your vision, values, and actions align, you become steadfast and immovable.
“ be steadfast and immovable, always abounding in good works, that Christ, the Lord God Omnipotent, may seal you his…”(Mosiah 15:5)
When you are in alignment, you may wobble under the load—but you won’t fall with Christ by your side.
Recently in a toastmasters meeting, I demonstrated alignment by having an audience member named Curtis hold out his arm and resist me pressing it down. He had a ton of strength as he stood upright and it was difficult to push down. Then I had him cock his neck to the side and lean over slightly at the hip creating misalignment, which made it easy to push down his arm. His strength hadn’t weakened; his misalignment took away some of his ability to use that strength.
Leadership is similar, When we are misaligned we can’t function at top capacity. Tires that are misaligned wear unevenly and pull to one side. If you have ever thrown your back out you know how some misalignment can hinder everything you do.
A Load-Bearing Leader is like a chiropractor in that sense where his job is to make the adjustments allowing his followers strength through alignment. He is also in charge of keeping him in alignment so he can tap into his strength.
Greg gives a great example of how even when we have areas of misalignment we don’t want to let that destroy a relationship. It is just like how Greg is a non-denominational Chirstian and I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There are zones of disagreement and misalignment, but we don’t want to let the 10 or 20% misalignment destroy a great relationship or create contention.
This was crucial for me as a missionary, I always looked for agreement or areas of connection first. Seeking insight over agreement is a skill leaders develop over time only if they are looking to live the law of alignment. How much more effective can we bear the load of leadership if we are in alignment and help our teams stay in integrity and alignment? We literally strengthen our bonds,deepen our understanding and empathy for others and avoid wallowing in the zone of disagreement.
Which adds light to how Gordon B. Hinckley encouraged us to , “Bring all the good that you have and let us add to it.”
Just like the old saying, “a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.” We are not leaders if we force obedience, we are leaders as we serve.
Just like how Dr. Greg Kimble said, ‘leaders have two hands for a reason. One is to say ‘here is where I can help’ and the other is to say, ‘I need help.” We need both to be in alignment.
D — Distribution
“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest... For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28,30)
Load-bearing leaders know how to make sure to distribute weight and transfer that weight for the highest benefit. Just like the 50 lbs bullet proof vests we wore for our last Gamma
Retreat was passed around. We were not able to break it apart into smaller parts like we often can in our regular leadership roles but we can pass the weight to trusted leaders that we develop. The greatest gift we have as leaders is to create more leaders.
As leaders we aren’t looking to help people fit in, we want them to know they belong. That we only share that load with other leaders we can trust. As leaders we get to choose how we show up and when disagreements happen with others in our organization once the decision is made we go from sharing our opinion and insights to gathering information to make a decision to support mode. An Amazing example of this is Chris Wiechman. He and Greg do not always see eye to eye but when the decision is made Chris sets the example of taking that decision and doing his best with the best attitude. How many people only do one or none of those things? They do their best with a crappy attitude, or they don’t do their best but have a good attitude. Even more common would be not doing your best and having a bad attitude. A load bearing leader recognizes when it is essential to lead, but even more so when it is necessary to follow.
If you want to experience more about how to develop this level of leadership stay connected!
Load-bearing leaders don’t carry everything—they carry what counts. They leverage strength, take full ownership, live in alignment, and distribute the weight to empower others.
This is just the tip of the iceberg, want to experience the full conversation?
Watch the Episode
Go to thefinalpercent.com/brighamblackham
Behind the ballcap
On stages across America, you’ll find Bil Lepp—the master of Appalachian tall tales—breaking stereotypes about West Virginia. In his ballcap and jeans, with hands casually tucked in his back pockets, he captivates audiences with stories that defy expectations.
Since 2003 Bil has been a full-time storyteller and lived an exaggerated life on stage while embracing the love of family and hometown joys at home. He hosted History Channel's the Man Vs. History He performs in storytelling festivals across the country and plans on doing it until his stories are no longer relevant, which if you have ever heard him speak, you will find they are timeless and entertaining.
In Business I don’t see a need for tall tales!?
Tall tales, when used wisely, can be a powerful tool in business communication. By starting with relatable truths and gradually introducing humor or exaggeration, leaders can highlight challenges, poke fun at inefficiencies, or make abstract ideas stick—without sounding preachy.
These stories simplify complexity, create emotional resonance, and make messages memorable. In meetings, presentations, or training, a tall tale offers a playful yet purposeful way to engage teams, inspire creative thinking, and land a meaningful point that lasts long after the laughter fades.
How tall can you tell a Tall Tale?
As tall as your audience will let you.
The art of a tall tale isn't in how outrageous it gets—it's in how believable it feels before it gets there. You stretch the truth just a bit at first—something everyone nods along with. Then a little more. If you’ve earned trust and built relatability, your audience will want to follow you into the absurd. It's like climbing a ladder into the sky—one believable rung at a time—until they suddenly realize they’re laughing in the clouds. So how tall? Just tall enough to surprise them... and still land the truth underneath.
Bil’s storytelling style is deeply Appalachian, full of larger-than-life characters and humor that’s both relatable and wild. But what does it take to tell a tall tale that truly lands? Here are a few tips I gathered from Bil’s experience you can use to improve your storytelling.
Start with Audience Relatability:
start with something simple and true that everyone can agree on. For example, Bil begins a story by saying, “My dog has a name” or “My dog can smell well.” This shared truth creates common ground with the audience because they surely have the ability to believe he has a dog. Also this relatability makes it easier for them to follow the story when the exaggeration comes later on. Eventually they accept that this is plausible and they only later get to decide what is real and what is just for the fun of the tall tale. Bil’s story ends with his flying by his frozen tongue to the side of a train, he knows where he is going as soon as he starts the audience just needs to strap on for the ride.
Use what Bil calls, “Gradual Exaggeration”:
For a tall tale to be believable, the absurdity must unfold gradually—like slowly turning up the heat on a frog in water so it doesn’t jump out. As you build humor and exaggeration step by step, the audience warms up to the wildness. But push too far too fast, and it backfires—just like yanking a Stretch Armstrong and tearing the arm right off. The key is to anchor the outrageous in something familiar and relatable, so the stretch feels playful, not jarring.
Be Unique:
“You have to be doing what nobody else is doing!”- Bil Lepp.
Bil’s tall tales thrive because they’re fresh, authentic, and rooted in Appalachian culture—told in a way that only he can. His competitive advantage comes from leaning fully into his unique identity and perspective. The same principle applies to you. When crafting your own life stories, ask yourself: What can I share that no one else can or will? This is how you position yourself as a one-of-a-kind storyteller, not just another voice in the noise. If others are doing what you do, your story might still be golden—but if you tell it like everyone else, it becomes a commodity. To truly stand out, share stories only you can tell, from a lens only you possess.
Know Your Story Deeply:
Memorizing the plot, details, or even the exact words of a story isn’t enough. To truly move an audience, you must know your story inside and out—understanding the deeper motivations of each character and why the story matters to you. When you connect with that personal meaning, you can translate it into real value for your audience. That emotional clarity is what builds trust and resonance. Even the most powerful tale can fall flat without it. Whether you’re telling a parable or a tall tale, the more you own your story, the more naturally you can relive it—and help your audience feel it too.
Test Your Story:
Don’t judge your story too soon. “Share it with at least 5 different audiences” was Bil’s suggestion. That will help you see what lands and what needs refinement. This suggestion is one that impressed me as a content crater. I often will give up on ideas too quickly based on Bil’s experience because of poor audience feedback. We may just be in the wrong audience.
Sometimes, a story—or a message—doesn’t land with every audience, and that’s okay. I remember a parable about a father who gifted his daughter a classic car for graduation—a rare Nissan Skyline R34. She first took it to a pawn shop where they offered her barely a hundred dollars, calling it scrap. Then she tried a used car lot, where they offered a thousand dollars. Finally, she brought the car to a collector’s club, and suddenly she had multiple offers well over $100,000. The car hadn’t changed, but its value shifted drastically depending on who was looking at it.
Her father explained that the car’s true worth was only recognized by those who understood its rarity. This illustrates a powerful lesson: your message, like that rare car, will be deeply valued by some and overlooked by others. The key is to find—and keep—your right audience, the people who truly see your worth. Don’t give up on your story just because it isn’t appreciated everywhere. Some audiences simply aren’t ready or worthy of it yet. When you find your people, your message will shine and your value will be undeniable.
Bil Lepp’s Truth Bombs
Beyond tall tales, Bil drops some powerful truths about storytelling and success as a speaker. These were the ones that I felt highlighted the most insight from his interview.
Treat Every Show Like a Job Interview:
Every time you step on stage, it’s like an audition—because everything really is an audition! How you show up during your stage time is your job interview to get hired again. Bil Lepp emphasizes, “Never take a show off.” Bring your absolute best to every performance, because your audience could be your next client, fan, or connection. Most of Bil’s future gigs have come simply from being present and giving his best on stage. This consistent effort creates opportunity—because someone is always watching.
I remember sitting in an acting 1 class at Dixie State University when Shakespearian Actor and professor Michael Harding, with intensity in his eyes, told us to really look hard at the people sitting to our right and left.
“Someone here will either cost you a job or earn you a job in the next ten years.” -Michael Harding
That same principle applies to speaking.
Every chance you get to share your story on stage is a chance to build—or lose—trust and interest. How you treat that valuable stagetime is crucial to you being hired again.
The quality of your storytelling and delivery is often reflected in whether people want to hear you again. Being asked back, is the easiest way to know you delivered well for your audience.
If your last speech sparked inquiries or follow-up conversations, you know you did well enough to serve others. Because at the end of the day, you are only as good as your last gig.
Know Your Audience:
Tailor your stories to the people listening. Whether you’re in West Virginia or beyond, being funny and authentic goes hand in hand with showing respect for the culture and people. The better you can tailor your message to the audience the better your message will be received.
Storytelling is More Than Entertainment: Bil quoted master storyteller Ed Stymer who encouraged,
“Never take the audience hostage.”
Storytelling is a responsibility—a connection and a gift—not just a performance. We must honor the time that the audience entrusted us to deliver what we promised we would deliver. As you build trust with others your opportunity to connect goes up and your ability to perform at higher level events will open up.
Stay Humble and Keep Growing:
Even after TV appearances and national recognition, Bil approaches every show with humility, viewing each as a chance to learn and improve.
Consistency is Key:
Success in storytelling isn’t luck. It’s earned through relentless practice and showing up ready, able and willing to deliver your best you can. Bil lives by the mantra: “I’m your man,” signaling commitment and readiness to deliver. Performing for all sizes of organizations with all kinds of budget restrictions allows him to see what he can do to add value to any organization. He doesn’t work for free at all but when you give the organization what they want they pay what they can.
Final Thoughts
Bil Lepp’s journey teaches us that storytelling is a craft that demands passion, authenticity, and discipline. Whether spinning tall tales or dropping truth bombs, the goal remains the same: to connect deeply with your audience and leave a lasting impression.
Want to hear an example of his Appalachian tall tales? And hear more of his hard-earned wisdom? Watch to the full episode of Tall Tales and Truth Bombs now!
Bil's Children's Book:
The King Of Little Things by Bil Lepp
#staybnbee #levelinup #podcast #billepp #storytelling #talltales #brighamb
I was deeply inspired by my call last night when Matt Gernetski introduced the concept of a SURGE as a "community-driven blitz". That idea is now permeating every fiber of my being.
I feel a surge of emotions—and with it, the ability to transform. Because transformation doesn’t just happen; it takes intentional power placed in the right direction to make it real.
A resurgence is happening within me. I’m stepping into my highest level—not to pull focus, but to push power toward power.
The surge is synergy in motion—a unified force moving toward growth as a group. It's teamwork in its purest form, where everyone lifts where they stand, and in doing so, they automatically raise their own standards—and the standards of everyone around them.
Because if we don’t rise together, the boats are going to leave the harbor.
A rising tide really does raise all ships—and this tide is getting higher thanks to amazing content like last night’s Infinite Serve Call
Thank you, Matt Gernetski, for your insightful, powerful, and meaningful experiences that you shared. I love you more!
There comes a moment — a crack in your timeline — when comfort can no longer contain you.
You feel it in your chest before it reaches your thoughts.
The pressure.
The power.
The push.
You’ve done the prep. You’ve waited, wandered, and maybe even wallowed. But now the window opens, and what comes next isn’t luck. It isn’t hype. It’s SURGE — a personal revolt against your previous limits.
This isn’t a sprint. It’s a detonation.
A moment of manufactured energy that awakens when you're surrounded by belief, by others who see your worth, and by the decision to rise.
⚡ SURGE: A Framework for Breaking Through
Let’s break it down. This isn’t about hype. This is about harnessing:
🔋 S – Supercharge
You don’t need more time—you need more power in the time you have. Supercharging isn’t about frantic hustle. It’s about intentional ignition.
You light the fire.
You crank the voltage.
You show up fueled.
🧨 U – Unleash
There’s a version of you behind the gate—untapped, unseen, underestimated.
Unleashing isn’t about discovering something new. It’s about setting free what was buried beneath fear, failure, or fatigue.
It’s all already there. Let. It. Loose.
🧠 R – Rewire
Growth without rewiring is just repeating in disguise.
To step into a new standard, you’ve got to break the patterns that built the old one.
This is where the work goes internal: mindset, beliefs, identity.
You don’t just change the action.
You upgrade the operating system.
🌱 G – Grow
Not surface-level. Not hype.
Deep, sustainable expansion.
You stretch. You adapt. You stumble forward with purpose.
Growth isn’t a result. It’s a requirement for elevation.
⚔️ E – Energize
Here’s where it becomes dangerous. Not just for the resistance, but for the barriers you once thought were permanent.
To energize is to pour power into focus.
This isn’t a blitz blindly running to the gap.
It’s a shockwave that obliterates self-imposed limits.
You don’t run toward your goal—you break through what once blocked it.
💥 This Is the Inflection Point. SURGE isn’t motivation. It’s movement.
When you:
Supercharge your presence,
Unleash your hidden strength,
Rewire your patterns,
Grow with intention, and
Energize your direction...
...you don’t just level up.
You redefine the level entirely.
This is more than mindset.
This is momentum made manifest.
So when you feel the tremble in your soul that whispers now,
when the room vibrates with possibility,
when others are pushing and pulling greatness out of you...
Don’t hesitate. Don’t hold back.
🚨 SURGE.
Because sometimes growth isn’t quiet.
Sometimes, it roars.
“Surge mode is something that as you are in surge mode your spouse is in Surge Mode too” You can borrow the surge power too” You sometimes need to borrow a surge but it comes down to the group dynamic of making
"Surge mode isn’t solo—it’s shared. When one person surges, others catch the power and rise together."--Matt Gernetski
It reminds me of how Becca Gernetski said, how when she recognize her husband is in surge mode, she also plugs into that surge to support his vision. That is the key to a successful surge as a community. It supercharges everything you do and we surge together through the challenges we do and the combined efforts of our village.
thefinalpercent.com/BrighamBlackham
(Member of Infinte Serve) i
#thefinalpercent #infiniteserve #Surge
https://www.thefinalpercent.com/infinite-serve-mastermind
Design Your Language w/ Kip & Lora Brown
Are YOU an Artist?
W.I.N. Don’t wait to play handball My Tribute to “Doc” Michael King
M.I.N.D. Muscle w/ Sam Rifkin
L.O.A.D.- Bearing Leadership w/ Dr. Greg Kimble
Tall Tales & Truth Bombs w/ Bil Lepp
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Contact
Brigham Blackham 435-238-0707
brigham@staybnbee.com
Copyright Brigham Blackham © 2025 All Rights Reserved.
I help leaders, experts and authors, like you, become unforgettable, engaging & confident on and off stage.
Dramaticly improve your communication.
Edutainment with a Theatrical Twist.
Speakers---Ever frantically and haphazardly thrown a presentation together then the technology crashed, so you crashed?
Leaders---Ever felt like you were verbally vomitting or Info-dumping on your team but they still didn't remember what you said?
Experts--- Ever spent hours training your teamonly to realize they forgot what you shared in your last meeting including you?
Authors--- Ever struggled to verbalize your expertise because you overshare on some things then realize you run out of time?
When communication counts...
Are you the authority who owns the stage or does the stage own you?
Are you a unforgettable-I-can't-miss-a-moment-experience or the bathroom break ?
Are you a Creative Compelling Communicator or a Snoozefest?
Are you playful or just pontificating?
I get it you feel like nobody knows your story and everyone Needs to hear it. Agreed, but NOBODY wants to actually hear the whole story. There is a reason movies are not years long, They are the better part of an hour and a half now. Every moment matters. Who cares which pair of shoes, you put on or what toothpaste you bought.
Nobody has time for your memoir.
Remeber your audience is consuming content, and if your story isn't serving them it isn't selling your message.
Applying my Story Hook framework dramatically improves your communication, making you unforgettable. It eliminates wasted time on info-dumping that’s forgotten almost as fast as it’s said. Your audience won’t be snoring, you won’t be boring, and you’ll be impossible to ignore.
My wholistic approach IS NOT about manipulation or performing more theatrically. Instead it is character development personally, professionally, in your health & Community.
Who you are on stage & off stage dramatically alters the impact of your story.
Are you in alignment?
"Your Actions speak so loudly, I can't hear what you're saying"--Ralph Waldo Emerson
Let's get your story straight.
Why Book Brigham as a Speaker?
✅ Make your message unforgettable
✅ Dramatically improve communication thorugh Storytelling
✅ Get your Organization in Alignment
✅ Clean Comedic principle-driven Storynotes
✅ Dynamic and Dramatic Communicator
✅ Engaging
✅ Out Care the Competition
don't book me if..
❌ want a canned keynote
❌ want a 'sit and get' speaker
❌ want audience not to have to participate
Can Brigham MC?
✅ yes, I love being the "The Master of Energy" not just a Master of Ceremonies.
Can you do full day intensive VIP workshops?
✅ Yes, I love to compress decades into days. Leading STORY transformation VIP workshops are big undertakings and this is acompletly customizable process based on your desired outcomes.
Why Book Brigham as an Speaker Coach 1:1 ?
✅ Done with you wholistic Character Development accountablity
✅ Done with you Framework Application
✅ Monetize your expertise
✅ Develop evergreen content stories
Don't blame me for the lack of resluts for the work you didn't do.
don't book me if...
❌ You don't want me to hold you accountable to do the work
❌ Your'e not willing to commit to apply yourself
❌ You want somone to blame for lack of results for not following the program
7 Essential Tips to Secure Stage Time
Professional Speaking takes more than receiveing the Accredited speaker designation. -Toastmasters Legends Dilip Abayasekara & Mohamed Shukri
November 22, 2024 An amazing coincidence happend. I was conducting research on how I can become an accredited speaker and thought I wonder how accessible some of these speakers that are legendary are. So I reached out to a handful of amazing speakers. To my surprise I had two world class toastmaster's accredited speakers who agreed to speak with me and share their insights. The funny thing was, they accidentally ended up on the same zoom call. This article is the result of the happened so far.
When the universe lines up, sometimes it delivers exactly what you need at the right time. That was the case when I had the privilege of speaking with two Toastmasters legends, Dilip Abayasekara and Mohamed Shukri, on the same call. What was supposed to be two separate conversations turned into a powerful, unexpected collaboration that offered invaluable insights into what it takes to excel as a professional speaker, launch your career and be an accredited speaker.
Who are these legends?
Dilip Abayasekara 38-year Toastmasters veteran & Accredited Speaker, Former President of Toastmasters International (2005-2006). Achieved second place in the 1992 Toastmasters World Championship. Author of The Path of the Genie: Your Journey to Your Heart’s Desire.
Mohamed Shukri is a Toastmasters Pioneer,being first from the Middle East to reach the World Championship finals. Author of You Are The One And Only: Unleash Your New Niche
1. From Free to Fee: Building Stage Time
Dilip and Mohamed both made it clear that stage time is the foundation of any successful speaker's career. Dilip shared his early days of teaching adult education classes where he volunteered his time. His focus wasn’t on the paycheck but on delivering value to eager learners, which gave him the stage experience he needed to grow as a professional.Actionable Tips:Volunteer for speaking gigs: Offer to speak at events or organizations aligned with your passions.
Grow your testimonial page: Ask attendees about their experiences and use their feedback to build your credibility.
From free to fee: Once you’ve built a track record of delivering value, start transitioning to paid opportunities.
"So you ask, how do I get the word out? You're constantly out there, speaking, sharing, communicating, connecting, and offering value."-Dilip R. Abayaskara
2. Find Your Niche and Own It
Mohamed’s eyes were opened when he realized he once again had failed to recive the accredited speaker designation. Why?! My subject was so interesting, I delivered it well, it was presented wonderfully. But he realized a little too late that ,When you try to speak to everyone, you end up speaking to nobody. His the turning point came when he received an email from the selection comitee for accredited speakers. It had one line that highlighted a crucial truth—a truth that sparked his book, his speaking career, and a massive shift in his approach. The key discovery was that by narrowing his focus to a slice of his Expertise and doing that ONLY, then people could recognize him and know who he was.
The line was, "we are looking for someone who is serving and doing good in their industry". Up until that point, Mohamed had been giving speeches based on his own interests, and topics outside his expertise. But after that email, everything changed. The phrase "doing good in thier industry" clicked for him, and from that moment, he began to focus on what truly set him apart—his unique value in his field.
"Surprisingly, paradoxically, when you narrow down the niche, you get more audiences because less people speak in that. So you become one in 10 rather than one in 1,000—you become one out of 10 only, who provide this slice, if not the only one. By the way, this is the title of my new book."-Mohamed Shukri
It is fascinating that Mohamed described how he went from speaking about almost anything to speaking about only a "slice" and because he took a very narrow slice he became know as the go do guy for Safty in his industry. That is a. perfect example of how hyper narrowing his speaking focus to safety for electrical engineers has made him stand out in a competitive market. The more specific your niche, the higher your chances of being recognized because you go from Thousands who speak on the generalities to the few who speak in specifics.
Dilip reinforced this by highlighting his work with Head Start, which he deeped "exposure for a worthy cause." Headstart is a preschool organization he is personally connected to their cause from hands on expereince. He focused on his experience not on generalities. He didn’t just speak for them; he became part of their story, which made his messages even more powerful.
How do you find your voice? Dilip gave this key to narrowing your niche:
By speaking to many audiences, gathering feedback, and refining your skills until, one day, you realize: This is who I am, and no one else can replicate me. No one else can tell my story the way I do.
When people hear your story, they’ll know it’s uniquely yours—not borrowed from a book or modeled after someone else’s life. You don’t have to imitate when the story is authentically your own. That’s what authenticity and integrity are all about—powerful in their own right.
Now, combine that authenticity with what Mohamed said about narrowing your niche, and you discover your unique value to the world. That’s when your voice resonates at its highest level.
Key Lesson:
Find a turning point in your life that connects with your career. Build a speech around it. Your story will resonate more deeply with your audience.
3. Authenticity and Alignment: Speak with Heart
Both Dilip and Mohamed stressed the importance of aligning with causes and organizations that you genuinely care about. Mohamed, in particular, shared how choosing an organization that resonates with you can bring out the best in your speeches.
Mohamed Shukri shared an experience where he spoke from the heart, passionately sharing his commitment to safety with his audience. He was expecting nothing, gave an heartfelt message then unexpectedly after that event the organizer walked up to him and placed an envelope full of cash in his hands. As he opened the envelope and was taken a back with gratitude. The organizer said, "Thank you, Your message was that valuable. I wish I could give you more." Serving with authenticity and no expectation of compensation, Mohamed’s dedication was recognized in a way he hadn’t imagined, but It marked a pivotal moment in his speaking career—a "shift" where his impact was appreciated, and the rewards naturally followed. The lesson? When you serve with authenticity and alignment, the recognition and rewards will come.
Dilip shared his experience with Head Start. Instead of just speaking for them, he became involved with their mission. He studied their work, attended their events, and spoke from lived experience—something that always shines through when you’re speaking about something you truly care about.
Pro Tip:
Speak for free when it’s for a cause you believe in. These opportunities allow you to give back while growing your speaking career.
4. Make It Memorable: The Aladdin Framework
Dilip shared a storytelling framework that really resonated with me—using clear, relatable examples to anchor complex ideas. He compared this approach to the simplicity of Aladdin’s three wishes. The framework makes even complicated concepts more memorable and accessible.
He also suggested tapping into local organizations, such as the Chamber of Commerce or trade unions, to find speaking opportunities. These groups can connect you to new audiences and help you grow your network.
Practical Advice:
Build your conversations around familiar frameworks.
Collaborate with local groups to enhance your speaking opportunities.
Dilip complimented me saying, “wow you learn fast!” It is all about value first and simplicity so it can be implemented. People pay for the impact & change not the speach
5. Turning Points: Moments That Define Us
The most inspiring part of the conversation was when Mohamed encouraged me to think about pivotal moments in my own life and career—those "turning points"—and use them as the foundation for my speeches. He also loved the concept I shared, "About Face," which centers around the life-changing moments that shaped who I am today.
Both Dilip and Mohamed agreed that storytelling is one of the most powerful tools a speaker has. By connecting your personal turning points to your message, you can turn individual experiences into universal lessons.
Actionable Insight:
Reflect on life events that shaped your career. Build speeches around these moments to create more authentic and impactful stories.
6. Owning Mistakes Not Dwelling on them
We all make mistakes, however it is how you respond to those mistakes that will determine whether or not people want to ever work with you again. When technical difficulties happen take responsibilility and don't play the blame game. It may not have been your fault but it is your responsibiliy to act professional. If you have a scheduling issue own it and make it right. For example, My first interaction with Dilip had an embarrassing start— I got distracted with who knows what and missed the first 15 minutes of our first call I scheduled with him. I was so embarassed I almost didn't call him back. I was embarassed, angry at myself, and felt like I needed to be extra accomodatind to make it on a call with him. Not a good first impression but when contacted Dilip again to reschedule—I owned my mistake and was so thankful that he still wanted to meet.
This moment became a small but important lesson for me: owning our mistakes builds trust and respect. Instead of focusing on my initial misstep, Dilip focused on my potential and encouraged me to keep pursuing my goals.
His parting words at the end of this amazing converstation stayed with me: “I admire your passion and determination to excel. Stay the course!”
7. Divine Timing: The Power of Connection
One of the most memorable parts of the conversation was the serendipity of the situation. Dilip and Mohamed already knew each other, and through our discussion, Dilip was able to help Mohamed with a logistical challenge regarding his travel to the U.S. for a national conference learning how to get a requested letter from the USA. Dilip had previously helped others from Sri Lanka navigate the same issue, and it was through this conversation that Mohamed received the crucial information he needed to attend the event.
This moment of divine timing reinforced the power of mentorship and the connections that can be made when people come together for a common purpose.
Moved By Music: Routines, Conversation, & A Special Gift
Can you imagine how you would feel if your favorite story, book or song was never written? We all know inspired music moves people. I know from experience that when audiences are moved, they move others. They share that message with everyone that means something to them.
I want to share an experience that moved me and introduce you to an up and coming artist. You are welcome for the introduction! I know you will thank me after you hear him play.
I first met Cade Mower through The Final Percent Network at an event called Infinity Summit in 2024. His passion for music and progress, immediately proved to me we were kindred spirits. Passion has a way of transferring enthusiasm from one person to another. That connection worked on me the first time we met and here we are almost six months later doing this podcast because of one night that changed his life and mine.
Moved by Music
Let’s start in the middle, Cade believes that the music industry is similar to the speaking industry in that it can be relentlessly unforgiving. I believe he is right on that. As creatives, we have to embrace vulnerability and being genuine in the pursuit of your passions no matter the initial outcomes. All things worthwhile take years or even decades to develop, not months, and music is no different. The key is to focus on the right work, build specialized skills, and improve over time. As you grow into the person who takes the right actions, you’ll achieve the results you want. As Dr. Greg Kimble says, "Be + Do = Have."
It's easy to get discouraged when things aren’t going as well financially or as quickly as you'd hoped. This episode is about keeping your dreams alive, avoiding bitterness so you can keep improving, and embracing gifts as they come so you can give in return.
Keep your dreams alive
Cade Mower originally from Bluffdale Utah had a dream of being a professional musician. He moved along with his passion to Texas and then ended up in Nashville to eventually change his luck through hard work and consistent daily actions of his routine songwriting.
Sure music had literally moved him but it isn’t enough to be moved to act, one needs to take the ideas and capture them. A crucial skill he has developed over years is his devotion to journaling and the ability to capture the moments when his Muse speaks to him. It could be a lyric here or a chord progression there, but as he faithfully makes time to capture and document these songs and do something with it he has been able to take his dream of producing an album and turn it into a reality. He took small and simple steps daily and it turned out to be exactly what built his momentum to succeed as a singer songwriter.
How did you choose which songs to include on your album?
Cade shared that the songs he chose had to ‘mean something’ to him that were most closely related to him personally, meaning the most vulnerable ones. That doesn’t mean they are all ballots, that just means the songs run deeper than the surface performance.
Cade has a unique style that is all his own, impressed by influences in Texas and Nashville his relatable soulful country is deeply rooted in family values and has a playfulness in the performativity. He even gave a couple preview songs on the podcast so you could experience it live when you watch the episode.
Download Cade's newest alblum here
Inspiration or Perspiration?
“I write only when inspiration strikes. Fortunately it strikes every morning at nine o’clock sharp.”-W. Somerset Maugham
Cade suggested that music moves him to be inspired to write more music but it is in the creative process of making it that inspiration strikes. The encouragement is to write everyday. Make it a routine, Write it down, period. A creative person needs to make a habit out of it. I agree with Cade that his Journal of experiences, stories, prompts for songs and the like all carefully written down can turn into beautiful music but if you don’t write them down consistently then you will never know what could have been. In Mandarin one of my favorite expressions is
‘The faintest of Ink is better than the brightest Memory’好記性不如爛筆頭 （hǎo jì xìng bù rú làn bǐ tóu）
I’m learning more and more that the consistent daily actions we take day in and day out often determine our success much more than sour aptitude. In one way when you see a masterpiece we can think of it as a work of art but it didn’t come easily to anyone. Nobody is born with a guitar in their hand or a paintbrush in their hand. It is a work of hard as much as it is a work of art that determines success. That hard work is to identify the work to be done and do the work consistently, relentlessly and with purpose.
Moved by a conversation & jam session
Have you ever had a conversation or had a kind gesture change the trajectory of your life? We all do even when we don’t realize it. One such instance happened the first time Cade came to an Event with The Final Percent Network. Little did we know that his decision to go to some random guy’s basement to an event could change everything.
It was at a pretty low point in Cade’s Career, financially and mentally he was drained. Almost grasping at straws to know how to make things work. He was in Nashville, but wasn’t as well received as he was in Texas. He felt like he was in an environment to perform but he didn’t feel like anything was happening. He felt stuck.
That is when one act of invitation changed the trajectory of his entire career. His friend Bryan Guadagno, of Skinny Pasta,after hearing how things were going musically said I need to introduce you to someone. He invited Cade to an Event, which happened to be the Infinity Club Summit usually reserved for Infinity Club members only, but he was able to get special permission to attend one day and met Dr. Greg Kimble.
I also met Cade there at the event and we hit it off. Cade could tell how welcoming we all were however what changed everything for Cade was going deep with a jam session with Greg and Bryan at Greg’s Home Studio into the wee hours of the morning after the event was over. Music brought him together and connected them intimately.
I remember connecting with Cade at that event and hearing about how he wanted to publish an album. It sounded like a bit of a pipedream for him at that point to become a professional musician, but the second time I connected with him he had a new determination and here is what happened that moved him from curious to committed to turn his dream into realiy.
A Gift that Moved his Music
It was the last event of the year for The Final Percent so Greg was pulling out all the stops. This was transformational. Absolutely amazing content but the thing that impressed me the most happened at the end of the event after the content was already delivered. A Gift that helped Cade move his music from dream to reality.
Imagine a room full of your supportive community members jazzed up from hearing amazing speakers over two days. Greg set it up so that Cade would play one of his songs on Greg’s new guitar.
Greg gave Cade the floor to perform and Cade rocked it. It was so fun to hear Cade perform a song live, then Greg did something entirely unexpected. At the end of the song he announced that he and Bryan wanted to prove that they believed in Cade’s music so much that they went halfsies on this beautiful guitar. That guitar is all yours. Greg almost teared up as it happened he was so happy to give it to Cade, but you should have seen Cade’s shock. This was the equivalent of giving him a car but this vehicle was one that he could drive in style to make his dreams come true.
We all cheered and experienced the surreal generosity of someone that really proves they love you more. As a community, we have done tipping dinners where everyone donates a hundred dollars each to tip the wait staff. It is amazing to see the impact a gesture like that can have on someone’s life. I’ve seen the elation and outpouring of appreciation before many times. It is truly magical to see their faces but this experience was different and more profound because it wasn’t about the amount of money the guitar cost even though it was an expensive guitar. It was the belief in Cade’s dream that made this guitar mean something more than money.
There was a sparkle in Cade’s eyes and it was like he finally saw that he had the keys to his dreams. His dreams were within reach and he could open the door. I could tell that his dreams went from ‘someday maybe’ to my ‘dreams are coming true today’.
Then Greg invited Cade to play another song with his new guitar. The song sounded just as polished as before but there was a richness and depth of feeling that filled the air and I noticed I just witnessed a breakthrough. That change was the belief that his dream was worthwhile enough that others would invest into it. I could see the gates open in his performance and it was now inevitable that his album would come out. That feeling of compassion, brotherhood and brotherly love is hard to describe. When you witness generosity like that, it is hard to not want to shout for joy and do good to others.
In a lot of respects, that is why Cade was on my podcast today. Not just because he was given a gift to perform but by accepting a gift he is able to give the gift of his music to move more people to change their stars and believe in themselves.
Because he was given a gift and he has done something with it I wanted to share it with you.
Because you are given gifts I wanted to share something with you. Please I implore you don’t keep them to yourself. Don’t withhold your talents. Please develop them and selflessly share them with others.
He now took his dream of producing an album and turned it into a reality this Friday, January 31st 2025. I wanted to support him because I believe in him like Greg and Bryan. We are all about ‘saying your dreams out loud’ and then doing everything in your power to turn them into a reality. Taking a holistic approach using the infinity Model to make it a reality is how we do it.
Cade said that when he felt that guitar in his hands it was a turning point because like he told greg before he knew this new guitar would be given to him, ”This might be the nicest guitar I've ever played. It felt like driving a BMW—tight, smooth, and just right. It sounded great, felt perfect in my hands, and, of course, I’ve always been a Martin guy and it was a Martin.”
“This isn’t Charity, this is Community.”--Dr. Greg Kimble.
Just like Greg and Bryan giving that guitar, I encourage you to give your story and experience to the world too. I believe in the power of generosity, I believe in abundance. I believe in caring about people and showing it by how we treat them. I believe in out caring the competition. I encourage you to support your community like Greg and Bryan did for Cade.
Experience a special preview of two songs on the full Episode.
God Bless.
Stop Being a Financial Nincompoop!
What does your routine have to do with building financial flexibility as a speaker? You have to hear Esther's take on this!
Even if you start as a financial nincompoop we will discuss how an abundance mindset, coupled with an intentional environment will foster growth. We will not be forcing growth like the foolish farmer ‘pulling the seedlings to help them grow’ 拔苗助长 (bá miáo zhù zhǎng). Just imagine that your small daily actions matter, and compound into the continuous learning turning knowledge into wealth. Turn your expertise into income! You can do it. This blog is packed with can’t-miss ideas to boost your motivation, execution, and results—helping you improve your relationship with money and take control of your financial future so you can monetize your message and fulfill your mission. You will also learn my secret to mastering a language whether that is Mandarin or the complex world of spreadsheets and percentages. It is simply relationships and people after all.
Am I a financial Nincompoop?
If you have ever tucked tail and cowered like I have when looking at intimidating financial realities it is ok. You are not alone, and you do not need to keep your head in the ground like an Ostrich hoping it will fix itself. The Cavalry isn’t coming, there are no Eagles flying down to take you out of the clutches of an onslaught of Orcs like you are in Lord of the Rings. You will have to pull up your big boy pants and start where you are. Yes that is as much for me as it is for you. All of us have challenges and
The fact is you and I don’t know everything
At 19 years old, I chose to serve a mission for my church The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and it was required of me to speak Mandarin. It was humbling being sent to serve in Taiwan, I didn’t realize how prideful I was and how little I knew until I had to question every word I was accepting into my new system of communication. Each new concept was like a new world of possibilities open up to me. For example, You may have heard that confucian saying, ””知之為知之，不知為不知，是知也。(Zhī zhī wéi zhī zhī, bù zhī wéi bù zhī, shì zhī yě.) ‘True Knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance‘. Therefore as I see it, knowledge is never complete. True knowledge is starting with what you do know then discovering what you don't know you don’t know. This process keeps us humble and ever improving, recognising that we are ignorant of most things the master teacher leaves us open to learn. So I hope that you will come to this blog with an open hand, open mind and ready to see how you can benefit from at least one actionable idea to improve your speaking and monetize your message while increasing your financial IQ.
"You can’t possibly “know it” because If you knew it you’d do it"–Michael Huggins (best-selling author of 7 financial cheat codes)
Esther Han used to be a self proclaimed “Financial Nincompoop” who didn’t even have the log-ins to her bank account, no idea what was in them. This never really mattered until tragedy struck her to the core. She had a dual income household, both her and her husband enjoying a six figure income each. What could possibly go wrong? Her husband worked in banking so YOU do everything finances” and let him take care of everything. Is it possible that the most traumatic and challenging part of her life, a devastating crippling don’t want to get out of bed Divorce may have been the best thing that ever happened to her? Let’s see what this means for you
“Whenever I know I need to do something I don’t feel like doing, I just do it anyway.”– Esther Han
Activation Energy and the 5 second rule
During her depressing and devastating divorce, Esther was debilitated to the point even getting out of bed was an undertaking. She discovered a simple tactic to mash her inability to move. She deployed the ‘5 second rule’, which was introduced to her by Mel Robbins. Esther used the 5-second rule to combat her bed’s tantalizing clutches on her productivity. Instead of lingering in doubt or waiting for a magical moment to feel motivated, she employed the 5 second rule to force herself to get out of bed and take action. By counting down and launching into action immediately, she stopped overthinking and made progress.
I read Mel Robbins’ Book called The 5 Second Rule and the simple strategy works.I took her TEDx talk challenge to wake up a half hour earlier without snoozing, and boom, I did it. Just like Esther said, when she didn’t want to do something—like get out of bed—she would 'just do it anyway.' Since applying that strategy, I have been consistently getting out of bed by 5 AM. It’s wonderful to generate enough inertia to take the first step. A total game changer for creating that startup energy to move.
Deactivation Energy: Deep Work & Compartmentalisation
Interestingly, I have often had trouble leaving work alone because I work from home. I have also found that this is just as effective to turn down and initiate a shut down sequence. I got this core Idea from a book called Deep work by Cal Newport and I combined the shutdown sequence just as powerful as the start-up energy. 5-4-3-2-1 Done. ust like a computer has a power-up mode to start its day and a power-off mode to shut down, I thought, why not apply this idea to my work-life balance? By intentionally switching into 'power-off' mode at the end of the workday, I can leave work behind and fully focus on family time. This creates clear boundaries and helps me recharge for both my personal and professional life.
So far the shutdown countdown has been a game changer. Last night I noticed I started steering all of our conversations back to work and bringing it up with my wife which was causing some dissonance. As soon as I was made aware of my hijacking of the conversation I used the 5 second rule shutdown sequence out loud to quiet those thoughts that were distractions so I could refocus on my wife and our personal conversation. I got my family time back on track and was able to have a very enjoyable evening. This was amazing, and I am going to keep using it. I challenge you to give it a try. Compartmentalization is something That everyone talks about but this is the first time I've been able to create a barrier mentally for that to happen.
John Rampton, Calendar.com’s Founder, told me while I was interviewing him last year that his secret to productivity was compartmentalisation. He was adamant about making sure that you had a proper compartmentalization for what he was doing. Each activity and task had a relationship to the overall goal and value of what he was doing, each role. I didn’t know how to apply his wisdom until I figured out this release or deactivation with the 5 second rule.
For example, John brought up how his mother works for him in his office and the only way they can function well is when they are at work she treated as an employee and used her given name. Then after work their relationship shifts and he calls her by mom outside of work their language even changes as the time is blocked. Try combining these ideas of countdowns and you will be surprised how much progress you can make in eliminating procrastination or as founder of The Final Percent, Dr. Greg Kimble calls it “Tactical Avoidance”.
Why do we wait until the New Year to make changes? Every day gives you a chance to take action, whether it’s for your career, personal life, or health. The 5-second rule shows us that we can start right now—no need to wait for a fresh start or a magic moment. Stay in momentum and avoid the cascade.
Routines: 75 Hard Vs. Project 33
Esther declaird strong routines were her key to success in understanding herself and directly affected her abliity to improve her financial IQ. Early on in her morning routine development whe attempted Andy Frisella’s 75 hard program. She went in with the mindset that she was developing new habits, but found quickly that it was too strict to keep her in momentum. So she did the program but not quite as written. Most people give up because the skill and discipline level is unreachable at the beginning, however Esther maintained a powerful mindset of "I’m going to do the best that I can."
'This wasn’t a singular experience. I have seen dozens of amazing people struggle to make those actions in 75 Hard a real routine.
Esther did a “75 easy” Esther version. That is where 75 hard fails foremost is if you fail then go back to the beginning and the strictness makes the “fail” cascade into useless failure, but Esther unlike many others gave herself grace and stayed building her routines even when setbacks could have derailed her.
The best way I've personally experienced to build and maintain healthy routines from scratch has been on the TFP Connect App’s Project 33. The motivational videos share simple ways that you can habit stack your personal growth. It helped me tremndously with vitality and is an amazing program. It is even free which means you have no excuse. Breaking news too, soon Project 33 will have a third level later this year! This program was instrumental to help keep me going on my own health transformation this past year where I used it as a motivational tool while working with my vitality coach Devin Thaut. I released 40 pounds in 99 days going from 245 to 205. My knees ar thanking me for that, Did you you know What's crazy is that you too can achieve similar results if you build the discipline of doing the program to get in momentum.
Once you have completed the Project 33 levels and if you want to attempt 75 Hard, sure make it happen. My only issue with 75 Hard is that its strict rules give no bend for mistakes. For instance my mentor Greg had almost finished the program and forgot to take one progress photo and morally had to start over, but before he went back and started at the beginning he got a couple hamburgers he had been depriving himself of. He calls this the origin of why he created Project 33. Your discipline level is a powerful indicator of your personal and professional development. Furthermore as self proclaimed Credit Nerd, Eric Counts says, “Don’t Jump the creek”. He shared that idea with the context of credit building just like in life and health. Patiently progress do things intentionally when building your credit personally and for your business. Your health financially is tied to your health physically too.
Esther discovered that her vitality was dramatically impacted by how much sugar she was eating and she said she now can ‘imagine what drug addicts feel like’ having such powerful withdrawals from sugar. Even 5 days in she was experiencing the brain fog that makes it all seem like she wasn’t being healthy, however as she stuck with it her routine helped her eliminate that brain fog.
Now I am not suggesting that you will get the exact results Esther got from taking control of her routine, however I know that being more intentional with what you do on a daily basis can only help you. When you design the life you want more efficiently than leaving it up to chance, good things tend to happen. Think about this: if all you did was download one new habit that helped you read 12 pages a day as your minimum, how many books could you read in a year, in a lifetime?
Esther wanted to make some progress in her health and it made her realize that she is open to focus on momentum and daily routines. Let’s assume you read 12 pages a day, and you did it everyday all year long you could finish around 21 books that were around 200 pages in a year. What if you add in a habit of learning one new thing every day no matter what and applying it you wouldn’t recognize yourself in a year. But let’s say you keep this pace up for 5 years, that is over 100 books. Do you think that if you read 100 books in your field of study that you would become close to a leading expert?
How much change can you make for good by applying a simple routine of your choice! Taking action, however small and aligning that action with what you know will make all the difference in your success years down the road. You will start to notice slight almost imperceptible shifts in your mindset,skillset and toolset as you start to get used to operating within your routine.
Steve J Larsen, founder of Capitalist Pigs, jokes that financial literacy isn’t enough on its own, you have to take massive intentional action, ”If learning was all you need, all librarians would drive Lamborghinis”
So what could you do to change your life, 5-4-3-2-1 Go Download the TFP Connect App now and start building your own powerful routine and do it with us in The Final Percent Network.
Will A.I. Destroy Speaking?
How will A.I. shape the future of professional speaking?
Will it empower speakers or replace them altogether? In this episode, Ford Saeks, CSP, CPAE, dives into the seismic shift A.I. is creating in the speaking industry and reveals how you can stay ahead of the curve.
A serial entrepreneur with over 25 years of experience, Ford has redefined success, generating over a billion dollars in sales worldwide across industries—from start-ups to Fortune 500s. With a resume boasting ten successful companies, five books, three U.S. patents, and countless accolades, Ford’s expertise extends to AI prompt engineering. He is a sought-after trainer, guiding professionals on how to use AI tools like ChatGPT to revolutionize operations, marketing, sales, and the customer experience.
In this conversation, Ford delivers actionable insights on how A.I. can enhance—not replace—your role as a professional speaker. Tune in to learn how to future-proof your speaking career in the age of A.I.
Danger, Would be Speakers! Danger!
A.I. is not here to replace speakers but to enhance their ability to connect, grow their businesses, and create a more meaningful impact. Embracing A.I. is essential for staying relevant and competitive in a rapidly evolving market.
Why It’s Important: In an industry built on human connection, A.I. can feel like a threat. However, it offers tools to amplify a speaker’s reach, streamline their workflow, and deepen their impact—allowing them to focus on what truly matters: delivering value and inspiring audiences.
Ford shared a powerful insight that all aspiring speakers can learn from, "A.I won't replace speakers but, but speakers who use A.I. will replace speakers who don't."
When I first saw Ford Saeks in action, I was blown away by his dynamic charm and effortless poise. On stage, Ford was a master at engaging his audience. His use of sound effects, hot buttons, and playful integration of digital tools created an atmosphere that was both entertaining and educational. He had fully embraced the digital age, leveraging tools like AI with creativity and flair—tools that helped him streamline processes and enhance his connection with his audience.
Ford doesn’t just speak about new technologies—he uses them, and it’s clear that his creative approach is powered by a curiosity and openness to growth. It reminds me of the story of the tortoise and the hare, but with a twist: What if the Hare had used AI to enhance his skills, learn from his mistakes, and get better with every race?
Innovation with A.I.
The quote attributed to Henry Ford—"If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses"—is a perfect analogy for understanding how A.I. is reshaping industries, especially public speaking. Just as Ford redefined transportation by creating a car instead of improving the horse, A.I. offers tools that go far beyond simply enhancing existing methods; it completely revolutionizes the way speakers engage with audiences and build their brands.
Instead of merely being "faster horses" in the form of improved templates or automated workflows, A.I. allows speakers to create entirely new ways of delivering value. For example, tools like custom GPTs and A.I.-generated pitch frameworks can help speakers refine their messaging, reach larger audiences, and maintain a consistent brand voice. These tools don't just save time; they empower speakers to elevate their storytelling and connect more deeply with audiences.
The lesson is clear: just as Henry Ford didn't let the limits of current demand define his vision, today's speakers should use A.I. to transcend traditional boundaries. Rather than fearing that A.I. will replace them, speakers should embrace it to enhance their craft, making their impact more profound and personal. Like Ford's car, the possibilities with A.I. are limited only by imagination.
Why A.I.'s Important
The speaking industry thrives on human connection, and the rise of A.I. can feel like a disruption. Yet, much like the ancient Chinese proverb 塞翁失馬，焉知非福 (SàiWēng ShīMǎ, YànZhī FēiFú)—'Who can say whether losing a horse, like the old Chinese farmer Sài Wēng, is truly bad or good?'—the outcome depends on how we choose to adapt and use these tools. A.I. can be a blessing if leveraged correctly, enabling speakers to amplify their reach and creativity while maintaining their human essence.
Using AI as an Interviewer to Refine Your Messaging
AI isn’t just a tool—it’s a versatile partner that can sharpen your storytelling and enhance your communication skills. One powerful way to use AI is as an interviewer, helping you rehearse for real-life conversations, media appearances, or client pitches. By simulating interviews, AI can ask thought-provoking questions, challenge your assumptions, and uncover gaps in your messaging. Whether you're preparing for a podcast, a sales call, or a keynote speech, AI can provide the structure and feedback you need to refine your ideas and boost your confidence.
Imagine AI as a curious podcast host, a skeptical audience member, or a supportive mentor. Each scenario brings unique challenges and opportunities for growth. For instance, practicing with a skeptical AI interviewer allows you to hone responses to objections, while working with a friendly AI coach helps you craft compelling personal stories. The result? You’ll be better prepared, more engaging, and equipped to communicate your value with clarity and impact.
Embracing A.I. like an ultra marathon
Adopting A.I. is like an ultramarathon. You need to run yoru own race. of course learning new technology requires endurance, strategy, adaptability, and a commitment to the long game. Here's an example of an unlikly Ultra Marathon runner that could parallel your future interacting with A.I.
Cliff Young, the Australian Shuffler, demonstrated the power of running his own race and defying conventional wisdom. In the 1983 Ultramarathon, he arrived with no experience in the sport but a deep understanding of his own limits. While others relied on traditional strategies, taking breaks to rest and recover, Young embraced a slow and steady shuffle, running through the night without stopping. His competitors were quick, but they needed rest, whereas Young’s endurance outlasted theirs.
By staying true to his unique strategy, Young won the race by hours, not mere minutes. His victory wasn’t about competing within the existing paradigm of speed; it was about redefining the rules of the game and achieving success through consistency and endurance. Young’s breakthrough shows that sometimes the key to success lies not in speed or perfection but in embracing your own strategy, innovating within your own capacity, and running your own race—no matter how unconventional it may seem.
The infinite game isn’t about winning once. It’s about getting better each time, competing not with others, but with your own previous version. The question is: will you choose to adapt and grow after each race, or will you get stuck in the past?
The key takeaway is that people aren’t paying for the process, they’re paying for the end result—the benefits they’ll gain. When Ford flashed that $10,000 in front of me, he emphasized that it’s not about how the work is done; it’s about the transformation they’ll experience. The process is simply a means to an end. The benefits are what they want—the time saved, the revenue generated, the impact made. So when you’re offering something, ask yourself: What is the ultimate benefit I’m delivering? It’s not about the features or the process—it’s about the end result that creates real value.
Ford's top tip for unlocking the true value of your offering lies in using a simple but powerful phrase: "Which means..." This phrase helps you shift from talking about the process to highlighting the end result—the benefit. It forces you to dig deeper and communicate the ultimate value you're providing. By focusing on the “so what that mean for you is..." you move past the features and demonstrate why someone should care. Watch the episode to see how this powerful tool can help you communicate more effectively and sell your expertise with clarity! A.I can help you clarify your benefits but you need to clearly understand this distinction to give it the prompts it needs to generate the quality questions you need.
Just like, "The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions." – Tony Robbins, the Quality of your engaement with A.I. is determined by your inputs. It is like a juicer. what you put in you get out.
Next steps with A.I.
Just like Tony Robbins says, "The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions," the quality of your engagement with A.I. is equally shaped by the inputs you provide.
Think of it like a juicer – what you put in is exactly what you get out. If you feed A.I. vague or poorly thought-out inputs, you'll get muddled, incomplete, or unhelpful responses. However, when you approach A.I. with thoughtful, specific, and well-crafted queries, you're more likely to receive insightful, actionable, and high-quality answers. Just like squeezing the best juice from fresh ingredients, the better the input you give A.I., the more refined and valuable the output will be. It’s a powerful reminder that, whether working with technology or shaping our lives, the strength of our results depends largely on how we engage with the process.
If you are ready to take your next step to craft your story here is a free download to improve Communication and empower your story.
Book your success story session today!
Directing Focus
Would it be helpful to discover how can you ensure your message lands with focused and emotional impact?
A Modern Day Hamlet
Brenda Adelman’s story begins with an unimaginable loss—her father killed her mother and then married her aunt. This betrayal became the catalyst for her life’s work and the creation of her one-woman show. Unlike Hamlet, who, filled with grief, sought revenge for his father’s murder, Brenda chose a different path. She sought forgiveness, not vengeance.
Through the process of creating and performing her one-woman show, Brenda delved into the trauma, not to vilify her father, but to process her pain and ultimately embrace compassion. Her dynamic story of forgiveness provided her audiences across the nation to seek forgiveness over revenge.
Her journey is about connecting with her own story and finding the strength to share it from a place of healing. Brenda’s story highlights the power of forgiveness as a transformative tool, showing that even in the face of deep betrayal, we have the ability to choose healing over hurt and to reclaim our narrative with grace and courage.
Brenda Adelman is a Speaking Director and author who helps individuals transform their stories into powerful messages, guiding them from the page to the stage with clarity and impact. Through her coaching, she empowers speakers to craft and deliver their narratives with authenticity, enabling them to connect deeply with their audiences.
Directing Focus: Why It Matters
Focus is a powerful tool. Where we place our attention shapes not only how we experience the world but how others experience our stories. For Brenda, directing focus meant transforming her audience’s perception of her story from one of tragedy to one of hope and healing.
In storytelling and speaking, focus ensures that every moment, every detail, serves a purpose. By strategically placing focus in the right places, speakers can guide their audience through an emotional journey that feels genuine and impactful.
Focus faces toward the right places
Brenda shared a compelling story about a client who was an activewear salesman who initially though, “I don’t have a story.”
This client was struggling to see how her personal experiences could translate into something worth sharing on stage. But Brenda, ever the insightful coach, asked a question that shifted the entire perspective: "Well, have you ever been in love?"
The client paused and replied, "Well, once." That seemingly simple answer unlocked a powerful narrative. The client discovered how that experience with unrequited love had profoundly affected her and led her to start her journey to running. She had used running as a way to process and channel her emotions. This seemingly small moment of reflection became the key to her story.
Through Brenda's guidance, she saw that the pain of heartbreak was not something to shy away from—it was a pivotal chapter in her life that led her to strength and resilience. By focusing on the right parts of her experience, the client was able to craft a powerful story, showing that even the most painful chapters can become the foundation for an inspiring narrative.
Brenda’s question “Have you ever been in love?” was a masterclass in how to direct focus. It shifted her client’s attention to the transformative power of personal experience, allowing her to see her own story in a new light. That story of love, loss, and healing became a powerful message that resonated with audiences, reminding us that sometimes, we just need to focus on the right moments to create something meaningful.
Focus to make sure that your message lands
During the podcast, I shared an experience that struck me hard and really hammered this point home about focus being pulled in the wrong direction and miscommunication. I recalled a time when I was in a situation that tested my ability to direct focus, and it became a vivid reminder of how crucial communication is, not just in the moment but in how we craft our message and how it is received.
Let me take you back to my last year of pony league baseball. I was warming up our best pitcher, Austin, on the high school field, right next to the dugout. Mid-warmup, our coach called for me, distracting me just for a moment. I waved my hand, signaling "hold up a moment," to let Austin know I wasn’t quite ready to catch. I said something like, “yeah coach?” But, the message didn’t get through to the pitcher. Austin didn’t see me, and I didn’t know he hadn’t heard me. The result? A fastball coming straight for my temple, knocking me out cold for a few moments. That hit was a painful reminder that communication isn’t just about what we say; it’s about making sure the message is received and understood.
Crafting a message is only half the work; the true art lies in ensuring it's received in the way it was meant to be."
That hit wasn’t just a physical blow—it was a wake-up call about how critical clear communication is, especially when it’s misunderstood or missed entirely. In storytelling and life, if our message isn’t clear or if the audience isn’t ready, we risk the same kind of misfire. To truly connect, we need to direct our focus, making sure our message lands where it’s intended. Like preparing for a fast pitch, we must make sure our audience is "gloved up" and ready to catch. Otherwise, we risk the painful consequences of miscommunication. The lesson? It’s all about aligning our focus and ensuring our messages are received as intended—clearly, purposefully, and with positive impact, not like a blow to the side of the head.”
Brenda's Layered Framework
Brenda’s storytelling method is rooted in a layered framework. This layered approach makes me think of a baseball sized jawbreaker, her themes are built in layers—each one complementing and deepening the others. They are interconnected but distinct stories. This method keeps her audience engaged while ensuring the core message remains clear and compact.
Layer your themes
Create Layers in your presentation by connecting them to an overarching Major and minor theme.
Think of your speech as a jawbreaker with a hard outer shell. Start with a solid foundation (your main themes), then add layers of depth (secondary themes), and finish with a memorable takeaway (your call to action). It’s like a jawbreaker with a Tootsie Roll center—the really good part that everyone’s waiting for.
So, how many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of your message? Just like the candy, your audience needs time and focus to break through the layers. The more effectively you layer your themes, the easier it will be to get to the heart of your message—the part that resonates most deeply and sticks with your audience long after your speech ends.
When you focus on the themes rather than disconnected stories, you create a more impactful connection. Not everyone will perfectly see themselves in your specific story, but by weaving universal themes throughout, you bring your audience to moments in their own lives where they’ve experienced those same shared human emotions. Themes are the key—they are the thread that ties the whole experience together. They allow your audience to not just listen to your story but to feel it, making the connection stronger and more meaningful. Themes are the backbone of your message, and when done right, they resonate with everyone in the room.
A Jawbreaker of a Message
Brenda Adelman’s framework isn’t a quick fix or a corporate formula—it’s a rich, layered approach rooted in years of experience. It’s a method that acknowledges the complexity of life, invites audiences to see the gray areas, and offers a path to healing and understanding.
By directing focus with intention and crafting stories with layered themes, Brenda demonstrates that the stage isn’t just a platform—it’s a place of transformation. Whether through a one-woman show or a keynote address, her method shows how speakers can elevate their message and leave a lasting impact.
Own Your Story
If you’ve ever considered sharing your story, Brenda’s journey offers a powerful blueprint.
I suggest starting by identifying your Major and Minor themes, layering your message, and finding creative ways to share your experiences.
Whether you choose a one-person show, a speech, or another medium, remember that directing focus is the key to making your story resonate.
What will you focus on?
How will you layer your themes to create an unforgettable message?
Your stage is waiting—step into the spotlight.
If you are ready to take your next step to craft your story here is a free download to improve Communication and empower your story.
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Principles Office: How to Give a Crap and the 4 C's of Influence
When it comes to leadership, we all know it’s about more than just getting things done. Great leaders know that building connections, inspiring others, and creating meaningful relationships are what truly move the needle. But what does it take to truly make a difference as a leader? For Jason Hunt, it all starts with the simple—and often overlooked—concept of giving a crap.
Jason, a former middle school principal turned highly acclaimed speaker and leadership expert, has spent years developing a framework that not only empowers others but also ensures they feel seen, heard, and appreciated. His leadership philosophy can be summed up in two major principles:
The 4 C’s of Influence: Building Leadership That Lasts
Jason’s journey from struggling as a middle school principal to successfully running a thriving speaking and training business is an inspiring story of transformation. Early in his career, Jason openly admits to struggling with leadership so badly that he once found himself hiding out in a portable classroom—frustrated and questioning his future. But as his wife encouraged him not to quit, he learned a crucial lesson: leadership is about people, not just policies. Through a focus on care, connection, collaboration, and courage, Jason not only turned around his school but has gone on to teach and inspire over 24,000 leaders across the nation.
The 4 C’s of Influence have become the cornerstone of Jason’s approach to leadership:
Care: Great leaders show up and make an effort to understand their team. They are genuine in their actions and create an environment where people feel valued.
Connection: Leadership is all about forging deep, personal connections. When people feel connected, they are more likely to be engaged and motivated.
Collaboration: A strong leader encourages teamwork and the sharing of ideas. Collaboration fosters creativity, innovation, and growth.
Courage: Leadership requires courage to make tough decisions, stand by your team, and sometimes even fail forward. It’s about inspiring others to step out of their comfort zones and push the boundaries of what they thought was possible.
The "Give a Crap" Framework: Recognition with a Twist
Poop Joke Alert:
Why did the leadership coach bring a poop emoji to the meeting?
Because you can't lead if you're not willing to give a crap! 💩
Give a C.R.A.P.: Celebrate Recognize Appreciate Praise
Jason’s Give a Crap Framework brings these 4 C’s to life in a fun and impactful way. It’s all about recognizing and empowering those around you. He encourages leaders to actively celebrate, recognize, appreciate, and praise the efforts of their team members through simple, yet thoughtful gestures.
Acknowledging hard work and achievements is one of the best ways to build trust and morale. Leaders should make it a point to regularly celebrate milestones, recognize efforts, and show appreciation.
Local Crap: Show your team you care by supporting local businesses. Jason recommends picking up little trinkets from local gift shops and giving them to your team as a token of appreciation. Small, thoughtful gifts go a long way in making people feel valued.
Timely Crap: Recognizing punctuality and consistency is key to fostering a productive team. Celebrate those who show up on time, meet deadlines, and stay organized. A simple acknowledgment can make a big difference.
Intentional Crap: Jason suggests incorporating tools like QR codes to provide easy access to resources that encourage daily intentional acts of leadership. This helps leaders stay connected and engaged with their teams while adding value along the way.
And let’s not forget the fun part—Jason uses squishy plush poop emojis to make the "Give a Crap" message stick (pun intended!). If that doesn’t show that leadership can be impactful and fun, I don’t know what does
A Legacy of Leadership
Jason Hunt’s journey is a testament to the power of turning struggles into success. After leaving education eight years ago, he transitioned into a speaking and training business with the mission of keeping leaders out of portable classrooms—literally and figuratively. His framework for influence—rooted in the 4 C's and the Give a Crap mentality—has helped him teach and train over 24,000 leaders across the country, all while building a highly successful speaking career with over 100 bookings each year. He’s authored five books, traveled extensively, and has exceeded all of his original expectations.
Jason’s message is clear: Leadership is about people, and the more you care, connect, collaborate, and have the courage to step up, the more influence you will have. And as he reminds us—sometimes, you just need to give a crap (and have a little fun while you're at it)!
Watch the full Episode to dive deeper into key concepts and principles that can transform your leadership approach. We cover Jason Hunt's impactful frameworks, including the 4 C's of influence and his Give a Crap approach, helping you connect, collaborate, and make a real difference in your organization.
Free Download of three reasons Stage Fright Costs and Why you Must Fix Them.
Attracting Adventure: Designing Your Life and Business
Meet Becky Lambert who is a seasoned real estate professional with over 21 years of experience in both commercial and residential real estate investing. As the president of Real Estate to Freedom, she has built a successful career that helps individuals and families achieve financial freedom through smart real estate strategies. With a background in property management, acquisitions, and development, Becky brings a comprehensive understanding of the industry. Her expertise extends beyond real estate, as she is also a mentor, a passionate advocate for creating purposeful lives, and a dynamic entrepreneur.
In addition to her professional success, Becky is an adventurous world traveler who believes in designing a life of balance, freedom, and impact. She’s a dedicated mother, business leader, and motivational speaker who encourages others to live life boldly and pursue their dreams. Becky's commitment to personal and professional growth, combined with her love for adventure, sets her apart as a true leader in the industry.
A Conversation A Year In The Making
“不怕慢， 就怕停。” — 孔子
"It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop." — Confucius
This conversation has been over a year in the making. We initially spoke about having Becky on the show and even collaborating on a project, but our schedules kept conflicting. This experience serves as a powerful reminder that follow-through is worth the effort. The insights Becky shared during our conversation were truly priceless. Her story of balancing family life, a demanding career, and an adventurous spirit is nothing short of inspiring. Buckle up—this is going to be an incredible ride!
Why does Adventure Help you Design your life and business?
Becky shared her journey into real estate investing, which started right after college. From her humble beginnings to her current role as the president of Real Estate to Freedom, she revealed how she has built not just a career, but a lifestyle that aligns with her values. Becky’s approach to life is about more than success; it’s about intentional design.
“You have to intentionally design the life you want to live, not just the business you want to build,” she emphasized.
She walked us through her philosophy of aligning passion with purpose, illustrating how it’s possible to create a thriving business while enjoying the freedom to travel, spend time with loved ones, and pursue adventures that feed the soul.
Adventures Beyond the Office
One of the most striking parts of our conversation was Becky's commitment to adventure. She believes that adventure is a key ingredient to personal and professional growth. Whether it’s traveling the world or tackling new challenges, Becky sees adventure as a way to expand horizons and keep life exciting.
“Adventure isn’t just about travel; it’s about stepping out of your comfort zone and growing in the process,” Becky said.
Her stories of exploring the world and pushing boundaries were as motivating as they were relatable. She reminded us that adventure can be as big as scaling mountains or as small as embracing new opportunities in daily life.
Impact and Legacy
Becky also spoke passionately about making an impact. For her, success isn’t measured by financial gain alone, but by the legacy you leave behind and the lives you touch. She challenged listeners to think beyond their immediate goals and consider how their actions contribute to the bigger picture.
“When you align your business with your values, you not only attract success but also create a lasting impact,” Becky explained.
Your Call to Adventure
This episode was more than a conversation—it was a call to action. Becky inspired us to think differently about success, freedom, and the adventures waiting for us. Whether you’re a seasoned professional or just starting your journey, her story is a reminder that the life of your dreams is within reach when you design it with intention.
So, what’s your next adventure?
How will you design a life and business that truly reflects who you are?
Take a page from Becky Lambert’s playbook and start leveling up today!
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Unsung Heroes of Sober Superstars
Bernard Quisumbing, also known as Buddahkai, is a dynamic advocate for sobriety and personal transformation. As the founder of the Sober Superstars movement, he inspires others to not only overcome addiction but to thrive and give back. Through his podcast and advocacy, Bernard empowers individuals to become beacons of hope and freedom in their communities.
The Birth of the Sober Superstars Movement
As Bernard shared, the idea for Sober Superstars came from his personal experiences and the realization that he didn’t have all the answers to help those struggling, including people close to him. This sparked a desire to interview individuals who are living their best lives in sobriety—those who have found the "keys" to freedom from addiction.
“The goal of Sober Superstars,” Bernard explained, “is to share the impact of those who are fully freed and living in sobriety, shining their light for others to follow.”
Sober Superstars & Superheros
This was a special episode because I am so in sync with Bernard I feel like we are brothers. I was moved by his passion and vision for helping those battling addiction. His Sober Superstars movement isn’t just about sobriety; it’s about transformation, advocacy, and lighting the way for others to live into their greatness not just abstain from addiction.
“Recovery isn’t a solo journey—it’s built on connection and collaboration. Together, we shine brighter, lifting each other up and spreading hope for those still in the dark.”
Bernard’s movement embraces multiple roles in the journey to sobriety:
Sober Star: Anyone in the process of becoming sober, shining their light and embracing the journey.
Sober Hero: Those who step up to help others, like sponsors or advocates.
Sober Superhero: Individuals who take the message further—serving, spreading awareness, and inspiring transformation.
Sober Superstar: Someone who is thriving in every aspect of life post-addiction, giving back to the community and helping others find freedom.
Each role is a stepping stone in creating a supportive and inspiring community for those in recovery.
Empowering Stories, Inspiring Lives
The Sober Superstars podcast is more than a platform—it’s a lifeline. Through powerful stories of resilience and freedom, it offers hope to those still battling addiction. Bernard’s focus on sharing the "keys" others have used to unlock sobriety is a testament to his belief that transformation is not just possible—it’s inevitable with the right support.
“Sober Superstars is about crushing it in every facet of life,” Bernard said, “and using that freedom to serve and help others out of their addiction.”
Join the Movement
The Sober Superstars podcast is more than a platform—it’s a lifeline. Through powerful stories of resilience and freedom, it offers hope to those still battling addiction. Bernard’s focus on sharing the "keys" others have used to unlock sobriety is a testament to his belief that transformation is not just possible—it’s inevitable with the right support.
“Sober Superstars is about crushing it in every facet of life,” Bernard said, “and using that freedom to serve and help others out of their addiction.”
Whether you’re starting your journey to sobriety, advocating for others, or thriving and giving back, the Sober Superstars movement has a place for you. Bernard Quisumbing is creating a community of hope, empowerment, and transformation—and you can be part of it.
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What does it mean to you to be a Sober Superstar or a Sober Superhero?
Grief to Glory: The Power of "Framily"
Life’s toughest moments often reveal the true value of the relationships we hold dear. Sometimes, these relationships aren’t just friends—they become framily—a unique blend of friends who are more like family. It’s this powerful concept of framily, along with the idea of carefully choosing your associations, that helped Chelsey Gonzalez turn grief into glory. In the latest episode of Leveling Up with Brigham Blackham, Chelsey shared how leaning on her “framily” and building the right network enabled her to thrive, both in real estate and in life.
Chelsey’s story is a reminder that the people you choose to surround yourself with can have a profound impact on your ability to overcome challenges and rise to new heights. By carefully selecting her associations, she was able to transform her grief into a powerful success story, creating a foundation of support that carried her through even the hardest moments.
From Grief to Glory with a "Framily" by Her Side
After returning home, Chelsey faced a new challenge: building a better life through real estate. But this time, she wasn’t alone. Chelsey leaned on a carefully chosen circle of friends—her framily—who supported and believed in her even when the path was uncertain. These relationships became the bedrock of her success. Whether it was a mentor, a business partner, or a trusted friend, her framily offered wisdom, encouragement, and the accountability she needed to press forward.
The Importance of Carefully Choosing Your Associations
One of the biggest lessons Chelsey shares is the importance of being selective with who you allow into your circle. Your framily is more than just a group of people you hang out with—they are the ones who will walk beside you through thick and thin. They are the ones who will cheer for you during your victories and help you up when you fall. They will challenge you to grow and keep you accountable when you might otherwise give up.
Chelsey’s story emphasizes that in both business and life, the Law of Association is critical. We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. If we want to level up, we must be intentional about who we let into our inner circle. Surrounding yourself with the right people—your framily—can either propel you to success or hold you back.
The Power of Framily in Real Estate and Personal Growth
By choosing her associations carefully, Chelsey was able to grow her business and enter partnerships that allowed her to thrive in a competitive market. One of her most significant milestones was becoming a limited partner in a large multifamily deal—a goal that was made possible thanks to the network of people who believed in her. These relationships weren’t just beneficial for business—they helped her grow as a person, reinforcing the importance of surrounding yourself with people who inspire you to be better.
Framily: More Than Just Friends—They’re Family
Chelsey’s journey from grief to glory underscores the significance of framily—the friends who feel like family. In moments of loss and uncertainty, it’s these people who truly make a difference. Chelsey found strength in her framily, who not only supported her through personal and professional hardships but also helped her see her potential when she couldn’t see it herself.
When we choose our associations carefully, we build a network of people who are invested in our success and well-being. These are the people who push us to be better, challenge our thinking, and hold space for us to grow. They show up when things get tough, and they celebrate with us when things go right.
Chelsey’s story is a beautiful example of how the right friendships—your framily—can be the catalyst for lasting transformation. Whether in business, real estate, or personal life, surrounding yourself with the right people isn’t just a matter of convenience—it’s the foundation for growth, healing, and success.
Go Deeper
Framily Over Friends: True framily—friends who act as family—are essential for overcoming life's challenges and achieving personal and business success.
Carefully Choose Your Associations: Who you spend time with determines your trajectory. Surround yourself with people who elevate you, challenge you, and hold you accountable.
Real Estate and Relationships: Success in business is not just about strategy—it’s about relationships. Building strong connections can open doors and provide the support you need to grow.
The Power of the Right Circle: Whether it’s a mentor, a friend, or a partner, the people who believe in you can push you past your limits and help you accomplish what you once thought was impossible.
Your journey from grief to glory doesn’t have to be one you take alone. By choosing the right framily and associations, you can navigate life’s toughest moments with confidence, knowing that the people around you have your back. Just like Chelsey, your success story could be written by the people you allow to walk beside you.
Ready to level up? Start by evaluating your circle. Who is in your framily?
Get your free Download of Three Reasons Stage Fright Costs and Why you MUST fix it.
Why NOT Mix Family and Business?
Loretta Wetzel is a serial entrepreneur, motivational speaker, and advocate for family-centered entrepreneurship. Her journey began when she received an unexpected call that changed her life forever. Loretta found herself at a crossroads between the security of a corporate career and the unknown path of entrepreneurship. Facing a family emergency, she decided to take control of her life by pursuing her dreams and building a business that allowed her to prioritize her family. With years of experience balancing business success with personal values, Loretta is a living example of what it means to thrive in both spheres.
Family and business are two pillars of life that many think should stay separate. But what if mixing them could unlock untapped potential? Drawing inspiration from a recent episode of Leveling Up with Brigham Blackham, featuring Loretta Wetzel, let’s explore three transformative concepts: the 6 P’s, LAVA, and five compelling reasons to mix family and business.
The 6 P’s: A Roadmap for Success
Loretta emphasized the importance of the 6 P’s in balancing family and business. These are the cornerstones for building a thriving life:
Purpose – Start with why. Loretta shares how understanding her purpose fueled her entrepreneurial journey.
Plan – A clear strategy bridges dreams and reality.
Posse – The right support system, both in family and business, is essential.
Prosperity – Systems and routines provide structure for success.
Poppin' – Striking a balance between emotional and financial investments.
Play – Passion keeps the journey exciting and meaningful.
LAVA: A Framework for Building Connection (Timestamp 14:14
The LAVA framework, a powerful communication tool that can strengthen both personal and business relationships. Here's a breakdown:
Listen – The first step is to truly listen. Engage deeply with what the other person is saying, without interrupting or jumping ahead to your own thoughts.
Acknowledge – Show that you understand by acknowledging their perspective. This validates the other person's feelings and shows respect.
Validate – Confirm that their emotions or experiences are real and valid, reinforcing that you are empathetic to their situation.
Ask – Finally, ask powerful questions that open the conversation further, allowing deeper insight and solutions to emerge.
Five Reasons to Mix Family and Business
Loretta passionately advocates for integrating family into your business ventures. Here are her top five reasons:
Shared Values – Families working together align on core principles.
Stronger Bonds – Collaboration strengthens relationships.
Legacy Building – Create a lasting impact for future generations.
Support System – Families can provide a safety net during challenges.
Empowerment – Involving family fosters a sense of ownership and responsibility.
Bringing It All Together
Loretta’s journey proves that family and business can coexist harmoniously, creating a synergy that benefits both spheres. By leveraging the 6 P’s, applying the LAVA framework, and embracing the blending of family and business, you can unlock new levels of success.
Catch the full conversation with Loretta Wetzel on the Leveling Up with Brigham Blackham podcast. Use the timestamps above to dive into the segments that resonate most with you!
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When it comes to shaping lives and transforming mindsets, Sharon Lechter’s legacy speaks volumes. Best known as the co-author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Sharon’s work has empowered millions to achieve financial literacy and personal success. In a recent interview on the Levelin’ Up Podcast, Sharon shared powerful lessons from her career and her groundbreaking book, Outwitting the Devil. This post dives deep into her insights, blending her wisdom with personal reflections and actionable steps for leaders and entrepreneurs.
Power of Association
In Fall 2022, I had the privilege of meeting Sharon Lechter for the first time at the Boulder Country Club during a regional event. I was sitting in the front row and was able to connect with her message about the importance of being in the right place, at the right time, with the right people. I vividly remember her giving me a hug when I told her that Rich Dad Poor Dad had helped change my life. She gently corrected me, saying, "No. You changed your life. This was just information you needed at the right time to make it happen. You were the one who implemented the ideas, so you get all the credit for the success—or the failures."
What I didn’t know at that moment was how profound the power of association would become in my life. Nearly two years later, in the basement event space of my coach, Dr. Greg Kimble, we set up this interview. It was years of growth in the making to bring this conversation to life.
At that event, Sharon encouraged me to write my story and share it, believing it would help people. She explained that there are people only I can connect with, and my story could serve as a catalyst for change—just like Rich Dad Poor Dad was a catalyst for me.
Relationships Are Your Greatest Asset
Sharon shared a story about how collaboration and authentic relationships opened doors she never imagined possible.
“Your network isn’t just your net worth—it’s your lifeline. Every relationship holds the potential for growth and opportunity.”
This reminded me of the power of connection in my own life. The people you surround yourself with will challenge and inspire you to reach new heights.
From Fear to Faith
While at the Summit, Sharon left a signature in my copy of her book Outwitting the Devil, which read:“From Fear to Faith.”
After reading this book multiple times, those four words encapsulate the essence of the book. It emphasizes how fear can keep us stuck in a cycle of inaction. Sharon shared a personal story during the interview about nearly letting fear stop her from pursuing a life-changing opportunity.
“Fear isn’t real—it’s just a story we tell ourselves. The moment you rewrite that story, you reclaim your power.”
Sharon’s advice? Acknowledge your fear, but don’t let it control you. Transformation begins when you choose faith over fear and take intentional action toward your goals.
“One’s dominating desires can be crystallized into their physical equivalents through definiteness of purpose, backed by definiteness of plans, with the aid of nature’s law of hypnotic rhythm and time” (Hill, 2011, p. 251).
The Power of “Why Not?”
One of the most transformative stories Sharon shared was her “Why Not?” mindset. Early in her career as an accountant, Sharon faced an opportunity to partner on a deal that would propel her into the realm of entrepreneurship. Overwhelmed by the decision, she turned to a yellow legal pad and created a pros and cons list—but she could argue both sides of the equation. The decision to move forward seemed daunting, and the challenges were enough to make anyone hesitate.
Instead of stepping back, Sharon wrote a simple, yet profound question at the top of her legal pad:
“Why not?”
This mindset shift changed everything for her. She took the deal, and it ended up being one of the biggest learning opportunities of her career. Whether it was leaving a corporate job, co-authoring one of the most influential financial books in history, or starting new ventures, Sharon used “Why not?” as a call to action—a challenge to embrace the unknown and trust in her potential.
Her story reminded me of a pivotal moment in my own journey. Like Sharon, I’ve often had moments of fear and doubt, but embracing the “Why not?” mindset has often been the key to breaking through barriers and finding new opportunities.
Own Your Story, Build Your Authority
Sharon stressed the importance of owning your story as a tool for connection and influence.
“Your story is your greatest asset. Use it to inspire and create impact.”
For Sharon, sharing her story didn’t just establish her credibility—it allowed her to connect with millions around the world. Her journey, challenges, and triumphs became a bridge that inspired others to take control of their lives.
Practical Steps for Leaders and Entrepreneurs
Sharon’s wisdom isn’t just inspiring—it’s actionable. Here are three steps to apply her lessons:
1. Ask “Why Not?”
Shift your mindset by asking: “Why not me? Why not now?” Instead of seeing challenges as barriers, view them as opportunities to grow.
2. Confront Your Fears
Write down the fears holding you back. By naming them, you take away their power and give yourself permission to move forward.
3. Invest in Your Story and Relationships
Reflect on your personal journey and find the narrative that connects with others. At the same time, prioritize building authentic relationships—they’ll propel you further than you can go alone.
Closing Thoughts: Be the CEO of Your Life
Sharon Lechter’s wisdom is a powerful reminder that we hold the reins to our own lives. Whether you’re launching a business, leading a team, or navigating personal growth, the key to success lies in embracing fear, owning your story, and asking, “Why not?”
As Sharon says, “You are the CEO of your own life.” Don’t wait for permission to step into your greatness—start today.
For more stories and insights, check out the full interview with Sharon Lechter on the Levelin’ Up Podcast.
Listen to other Levelin' Up Episodes here
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Three Reasons Stage Fright Costs
And WHY You Must Fix It!
Confidently bring your expertise from the page to the stage.
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money, impact or face!
The Story Hook Method by Brighamb.com
Focus Story
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Lorem ipsum, or lipsum as it is sometimes known, is dummy text used in laying out print, graphic or web designs. The passage is attributed to an unknown typesetter in the 15th century who is thought to have scrambled parts of Cicero's De Finibus Bonorum et Malorum for use in a type specimen book.
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Lorem ipsum, or lipsum as it is sometimes known, is dummy text used in laying out print, graphic or web designs. The passage is attributed to an unknown typesetter in the 15th century who is thought to have scrambled parts of Cicero's De Finibus Bonorum et Malorum for use in a type specimen book.
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